Parenting Humor
I Worry About My Kid’s Awful (But Funny) Table Manners
Every damn time we have guests, my boy turns into a hot mess at the dinner table
Our Ben, three and a half years old, has a new hobby: burping.
Thanks to his constant training, he’s now a master of the burp concert.
His performances take place in a variety of venues: at the dining table, in restaurants, at grandma and grandpa’s, and especially when we have guests, like our landlady.
Me: “Ben, my darling, could you please stop burping? It’s a bit inappropriate, especially in company.”
Ben, ever the entertainer, answers with a burp.
My husband: “Well Ben, that’s not exactly the height of politeness. How about a ‘please’ and ‘thank you’ instead of a burp?”
Ben, unimpressed, continues his concert.
My husband and I also have a hobby: reading parenting guides (much to the dismay of my monster-in-law who believes that parenting should come naturally, but that’s a different story). So, we read in a parenting guide that it might help to ask a child to continue doing what they’re doing, like throwing sand, as it might encourage them to stop. In other words, do the exact opposite.
