Humor | Satire | Parenting
Is Your Boss More Mature Than a Toddler?
Playing “no takebacksies,” but with millions of dollars on the line
Even though I had climbed to the peak of the corporate ladder, I still felt like the universe didn’t revolve around me as much as it should.
Despite my tailored suits, self-aggrandizing speeches, and life-sized statue in the break room, my ego refused to inflate past the size of Jupiter. I even adorned my office walls with oversized portraits of myself, strategically positioned to catch the eye of anyone who dared enter. But still, a gnawing sense of inadequacy persisted.
Everything changed after I helped care for my 2-year-old nephew, whose entire vocabulary can be summarized with two words: “no” and “mine.” Here I was, a grown man with a billion-dollar company, and I couldn’t even get Alexander to share a goldfish cracker without a full-scale meltdown. I offered him stock options for a single bite of his cookie, or his own private island if he could part with a Lego. He remained unmoved, his tiny fists clenched around his treasures. I began feeling as if in the world of toddlers, I was a mere intern, fetching snacks and bending to the iron will of someone who would one day grow up to become one of the world’s most determined leaders.
