Quiz: Am I Trying To Get My Kid To Eat Yogurt Or Join Tinder?
You decide
Backstory: When my son was a toddler, he didn’t like yogurt. Who the hell knows. Something about texture. I did my best, using a series of talking points, in the hopes he’d one day enjoy fermented milk blended with live bacteria. Like a normal person.
He wasn’t about it. As an adult, he feels a similar kind of way about online dating. This is me. Still trying.
1. I won’t force you, kid.
2. This is supposed to be fun.
3. You didn’t like cupcakes at first, either. Now you can’t get enough of them!
4. I would have loved this at your age.
5. Free your mind.
6. Have I ever steered you wrong?
7. It’ll help make you regular.
8. Don’t go all in right away. Just start with a nibble.
9. What are you, ninety? You’re a little young to be stuck in your ways.
10. This is nothing to get angry about. You want to get angry? Let me tell you about the Patriot Act and how in the name of God it passed Congress.
11. This can’t be all bad, your friends love it.
