Humor

You Think YOU Dread Preschool Open House Evening as a Parent? Try Being a Preschool Teacher.

Here’s a behind-the-scenes look at the preparation involved

Image created in Canva by the author.

We get it — evening school events disrupt dinner, bath, bed time. There will be at least one meltdown. It takes days for your child to recover.

Well boo fricking hoo! Step into my Dansko clogs for a hot minute and see who has problems.

The principal loves to schedule Open House around two weeks into the school year. With the usual adjustment period of tears and serial potty accidents, plus the standard schedule of snack, outdoor play, lunch, and nap, I have maybe forty minutes total to pull Evidence of Meaningful Curriculum out of your children and plaster it onto my classroom walls.

Here’s how it goes down:

“Children, you are going to put five dot paint marks on your paper. OK count with me — Thomas let’s get you a new paper, that was many many more than five and we haven’t even started yet. Jason, that’s not your paper, that’s Cassidy’s new white cardigan. Sara, I know you want to do three dots because you’re three, but we’re going to show we can count to five. I see that you’re upset. So is Miss Anna.”