A Free Write on My Day
Not really, more like my background in free writing, a deficiency in language, snap chat breaks, vlogging, why I like Medium, and thinking “wonderful.” Oh where the mind goes.
My English professor had us free write from time to time. It was to help us brainstorm ideas for our upcoming paper, or to come to certain realizations about our writing. She wanted us to just keep writing. And writing. And writing. If we ran out of ideas we could write, “I’m out of ideas. I’m out of ideas. I’m out of ideas.” Because then a sound idea might finally come to us.
As long as we kept writing.
So I had this idea to try that again, hence the title of this piece. But even as I try to just keep going, grammar mistakes and all, I can’t. I’ve paused at least ten times to re-read and re-type to make sure that is all sounds coherent and I don’t look like an idiot.
Even just now, before typing “idiot,” I tried “dumb f*k” first, then thought about “dumb a**,” then tried for something smarter like “ignoramus.”
But none of those sounded right, or like me. I have an “image” (a “brand”) to uphold, and wouldn’t want anyone to think negatively of me or my business because of deficiencies in language.
Ope. There was a break.
I ran out of ideas for a moment, so I responded to a Snap Chat.
The above title was messing with editing options. I really didn’t know what it would do, but I decided to leave it.
So, back to writing.
Free writes are dangerous. One teacher I had didn’t like to let her students free write because when she would read them, almost all students thoughts turned aggressive. She tried it with us, and I think mine only went aggressive because now I was conscious of it. Otherwise, I don’t think it would have.
I’m not aggressive person. Just have a short fuse at times. But, you know, who doesn’t get a little angry about a dirty doorknob every once in a while?
I have germaphobe tendencies sometimes.
Did you know “germaphobe” isn’t a real word? I just paused this free write because I saw that evil red squiggly line that indicates incorrect spelling. So I wanted to research what it really was. Turns out the real term for the condition of people that have a pathological fear of germs is, “Mysophobia.”
*Another Snap Chat break*
I like the idea of free writing. The documentation of someone’s rambling thoughts is fascinating to me. It’s so interesting to see where people’s minds are going, uncut, raw, and completely under the gross disection of its reader or viewer.
This has only become a recent fascination of mine. Because of it, I’ve started vlogging. I don’t get many views. I don’t know if it’s because no is interested in what I have to say, or just because I’m new to it so people can’t find me.
Whatever the case, I am fascinated by the thousands of vloggers out there with thousands of subscribers that have absolutely NOTHING to say. One random person was from Hawaii, visiting the San Diego Zoo, and filmed the random things they did there. The amount of views this person had for a video where they did something mildly interesting but not in the least educational, motivational, or even entertaining was flabbergasting.
It made me wonder where I was going wrong.
Why do some people’s words get heard while others’ don’t? Why is it that so many ones that have nothing of value to contribute to society get so much attention?
It made me realize why I like Medium so much. The more I read, the more I see how many thousands of intelligent and driven minds there are out there.
I’ve
*Snap Chat break”
I’ve almost forgotten what my thought was. But here it is: I’ve realized the intense amount of hidden passion that there is in our society.
I’ve realized that there are people like me, out there.
I don’t say much back to the authors, but the amount of Creeping I do is relentless.
Or I guess it isn’t really Creeping, since all of these writers purposely put there thoughts out there for others to either disregard or intrigue.
That is what I am finding wonderful about Medium. There is so much encouragement out there. So many people dreaming of something bigger, of revolutionizing, of writing MORE.
I guess I find it fascinating because I have kind of been a recluse/sheltered/set apart for much of my life. Or maybe it’s because I’m young, a mere number of 18, so I just haven’t had the chance to witness it all in person. Or maybe it’s because with such advancements in social media, others are making this discovery as well.
In such a social media driven society, it is so much easier to get your thoughts published and read, your ideas accomplished, your feelings admitted and shared.
It’s wonderful.
It’s wonderful to hear the stories of others, hear their heartbreak, likes, dislikes, that they fell in love hundreds of times starting at 11 years of age, or that they dream of settling down in a fortress of solitude in the mountains.
It’s wonderful to think about how many people there are in the world.
It’s made me think of a bigger picture. That I’m just one tiny piece of the puzzle.
It’s made me dream of bringing others together, utilizing this amazing potential and power that we all have with our words, and really changing something.
Is that possible? Or am I dreaming too big?
I can’t tell.
What I do know is that I will keep dreaming. Because where would this society be without that tiny, unimportant someone who dared dreamed about making a few more connections?
