LEGO Men
There is a little LEGO man in our playroom who sends my heart aflutter whenever I encounter him. He is ruggedly handsome, clad in denim overalls, with a knowing, somewhat come-hither, half smile on his face. I am pretty sure he is flirting with me but I try to play it casual when we meet, not giving him too much encouragement, because why even go there? I am married and he is a tiny plastic toy. Nothing in this scenario could ever result in any good outcomes:
There is another LEGO man whom I also kind of have a crush on, although not as much as the first guy. Maybe it is because he is a firefighter and just looks like an all around friendly guy — maybe he’s funny and tells good jokes. If he would ever speak to me, I’d know:
On another note, this next guy can’t understand why I won’t date him. I wish you the best of luck, ironic hipster quasi-police man:
This one seems like he’s really great, but I’m not sure if the chemistry is there between us. I do appreciate that he lacks the vanity to eschew the use of safety goggles. And I like the tool belt. Perhaps we could be friends and see where this goes?
Whoa, dude, you’re scaring me. Why so angry? Oh, yeah, I’d be angry too if someone forced me to wear a sleeveless, striped shirt with a polo collar.
You seem handsome and successful, LEGO man, but I distrust people from the financial industry after you guys destroyed the world economy back in ’07/’08. I wish you the best of luck; you should have no trouble finding someone who will love you for your abundant money and overlook your utter lack of decency and morals:
You look like you’ve been in a fight, sir. Maybe go home and sleep this one off.
This one looks like he just farted:
Hmmm. This one is interesting and sexy but he looks like he’s a player, and I’m a little intimidated by that sort of thing. One night stand material, maybe?
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