Rekindling Meaning in Your Life

As a kid, I never really had to think about any grandiose goals. Life was pretty simple. Get up, go to school, do homework, go to bed. Repeat for 12 years.

Over those years, I had different interests — sports, music, academics…and increasing responsibilities — chores, driving, working. But, the overall plan was still pretty straightforward. Get up, go to school, go to practice or work, do homework and chores, go to bed. Repeat.

Besides limited decisions, there was not a lot of room for lofty goals.

As high school progressed, the decision of where to go to college and what to study became the biggest concerns.

Other goals fell in to place…graduate, get a job, get married, buy a car, buy a house, raise a family. Beyond the typical life goals many have…or develop based on their personal interests (such as studying abroad or becoming a professional athlete) …I still never really had to think long and hard about where my life was headed.

After my sons were born, I busied myself with raising my family. My interests and goals took a back seat to my primary responsibility — raising my children (hopefully to become the best versions of themselves — although there wasn’t a guide book tailored to their individual personalities and learning styles!)

PREDETERMINED GOALS

I realize that not everyone has the same life goals and that each person’s path will be unique.

However, I bet that you had a similar experience where your first set of life milestones were already laid out for you…kind of like a “To Do List for Life.” Your job was to work to accomplish them.

At some point, though, you will most likely accomplish the items on your list…perhaps after altering some and removing others.

In the end, whatever remains on our personal lists will remain until it is achieved.

This listing gives us items to continually focus on achieving and striving for…it gives us a sense of purpose — whether we realize it or not.

This is all great…and helps us focus on what we are trying to accomplish in life…but the problem comes when there are no more items on our list to pursue.

NOW WHAT?

You’ve achieved your main life objectives… That’s great news…you’ve checked off all of those boxes! But…your predetermined list of future goals is now empty. If you haven’t added to the listing with your own personal aspirations, the lack of goals can be frightening and may make you wonder… “What’s next?

This is what gives rise to the idea of a Midlife Crisis.

What should be a sense of accomplishment can lead to despair and thoughts on what else should have been accomplished but wasn’t…or an evaluation on the purpose of life and what else there may be left to do…or concern that there may not be enough time to accomplish anything else.

A NEW PURPOSE

“The mystery of human existence lies not in just staying alive, but in finding something to live for.”

Fyodor Dostoyevsky, The Brothers Karamazov

Just because your original listing has been accomplished, it doesn’t mean you can’t attain anything else. It’s quite the opposite.

If you haven’t already, this is the time to make a transition from your completed listing to creating a new one. It’s not too late to find a new sense of purpose…and it doesn’t have to be as long term as the ones you understood as a child.

Be creative on your new goals.

• Maybe you’ve always wanted to learn to bake…perhaps your goal will be to try a new recipe each week.
• It is possible that you’ve wanted to volunteer or give back to the community…and now you have the time.
• Perhaps you want to learn more…you can go back to school, read up on various topics, or participate in a discussion forum.

The key is that the options are limitless…and the intent is to find a new purpose that brings meaning to your life. It doesn’t matter if it’s something purely personal, work-related, or religious. And, if none of those bring inspiration, you can always focus on improving yourself…regardless of how major or minor the improvements may be.

This can be done by enhancing your knowledge, strengthening your weakest areas (mentally or physically), combating bad habits, curving addictive behaviors, etc.

Since a young age, we’ve been conditioned to always have something to work towards or achieve…so filling that gap with activities that are meaningful will help provide a new sense of purpose and satisfaction…while also helping to fight off depression and despair.

LIVING BY CHOICE

Hopefully, having a midlife crisis or running out of goals will not be an issue for you.

Regardless, having a sense of purpose and a list of goals to accomplish are keys to having a sense of satisfaction in your life. It should quell those voices that may make you restless, uneasy, or depressed.

Goals provide you with hope and help motivate you to continue to accomplish — regardless of where you are in life or what you may or may not have already achieved.

So, if you are still working on your original “To Do List for Life,” be sure to add to it so it never runs empty.

If you have run through your list or are coming close to the end, identify new activities to pursue and work to develop a new sense of purpose for your life.

Remember — it doesn’t have to be something large…it can be anything that provides you with a purpose and a sense of satisfaction.

Creating a focus on what drives you each day is a great place to start as 2019 is just beginning.

“Occupy your thoughts with purpose and you will be so busy pursuing a meaningful future there will be no time for doubt, chaos and disappointment.”

Carlos Wallace, The Other 99 T.Y.M.E.S: Train Your Mind to Enjoy

Originally published at freedomsreach.com on January 14, 2019.