On The Scene
Life in 20th Century Mississippi Through the Eyes of Delores Worthy Hopkins
To share lifelong memories and authentic stories from heart to heart, soul to soul, past to present. This is the ultimate goal of my heartfelt conversation with my Aunt Delores. Throughout my life, I have fostered a one-sided perspective of who and what my family truly is, but no more. Now, it is time to listen intently to the other side. It is time to erase the blur that lingers over my paternal pedigree. It is time to uncover the other half of me.
While the reality of our blackness simmered in the back of my mind, I settled down within the confines of my dorm room, recorder in hand, and prepared to hear a compelling narrative reflective of every lesson I’d ever been taught about Black history in grade school. While my present knowledge of our history sharpened throughout my aunt’s autobiographical imagery, new knowledge was transplanted, and I realized that some things were not always as they seemed to my educated brain. As I now know, it is always important to strengthen your current knowledge. Yet, it is equally important to be open to new truths and shocking realities…
So, now it is time. I present to you a stunning narrative of life in 20th century Mississippi through the eyes of Delores Worthy Hopkins. Press Play.
Alicia: When and where were you born and raised?
Aunt Delores: I was born in Louisville, Mississippi…on October 6th, 1948, in Winston County.
Alicia: Describe the most memorable experience of your childhood.
Aunt Delores: Okay. I’m going to do this in two parts: early childhood and maybe a little later. The first most memorable experience, I think, that sticks to me as being real significant occurred one summer. When I was about nine or ten years old, my mom went to Chicago to visit her sisters there, but I stayed home and stayed with a cousin of mine. It was the first time that I probably ever went on some form of a vacation. We went to a place called Grenada Dam located in Grenada, Mississippi, where we stayed for about three days in a cabin. My cousin’s father liked to fish, and so this was like a fishing area, like a resort but a very low style resort. But it was the first time I’d ever stayed in a cabin. This event just kind of always stuck in my mind, even to this day. Each time I travel through the town of Grenada, Mississippi, I think about that experience. Probably another memorable experience I think I could share was probably the very first time, as a child, I truly experienced racism. I was probably again about 10 or 11, and I had a job to babysit with a couple with their lil’ son and daughter. And I remember seeing them in the store one evening, and the lil girl, who was about 3 years old, wanted to run up to me and hug me because she recognized me. But she was with her mom, and I remember her mom pulling her back and telling her, “No. You can’t speak to her now.” And somehow, even as a young child, I felt that it wasn’t that she couldn’t speak to me, but it was because of who I was and where we were at the time. And it was the first time that I really felt racism or understood what it was like, event though I grew up in really segregated times.
Alicia: What was it like to be the only girl in the family? How did it feel to be misunderstood, ignored and even ruffed up by your brothers?
Aunt Delores: Being the only girl in the family clearly had some advantages because often I got special treatment because I was the only girl. And my mom was very protective of me in many ways. In terms of being misunderstood, I don’t ever remember feeling misunderstood when it came to my brothers. I had three brothers. And, of course, in a small town, you didn’t have a lot of options growing up in the South at that time. So, often, we all had to play together. And, you know, I could join the team when they need somebody else to be there or when it when it was convenient for them or when none of the other guys were around. (Chuckles) So, you know it was kind of…we only take you when we can use you to be the third person on the team or to be the fourth person out. But many other times, I remember feeling very protected by them though because, in a way, I was their sister. I was often the only girl when we were playing. If I was the only girl around, they were very protective. So it wasn’t bad, but certainly there were times when I kind of felt like the odd man out.
Alicia: You couldn’t do what?
Aunt Delores: When I felt like I was the odd person there, you know. And often (the) odd man out, which means that you kind of stood out from the rest of the crowd…That’s an old term.
Alicia: Describe your formal education.
Aunt Delores: Well, formal education, I’m assuming you mean beyond grammar school, beyond elementary school. I started school, in 1954. And if you will remember your history, that was the year the Supreme Court decision was rendered that ruled that desegregated schools were unconstitutional. But, of course, in the South, nothing changed. I started school in a lil’ wooden school building, and my first grade teacher was a very nurturing teacher. She really impacted my life in a lot of ways. I found out later years that she actually was not an elementary teacher. She was a high school teacher; but she needed a job and this was the only job that was open. So later, she was my 8th grade English teacher. She was also my 12th grade English teacher. So she really impacted my life in that later I became an English teacher. A lot of teachers taught across grade levels in that era. Teaching out of your areas of certification was not a huge factor as it is today. I graduated second in my class. I attended college as the result of a scholarship that was given by a paper mill company that had just opened in our town called Georgia Pacific. They gave a scholarship to a top Black and a top White student in the town, and I received the scholarship that year.
So, I went on to graduate from Jackson State University with a B.S. degree in English. I got married immediately following graduation, and my husband at that time had a scholarship in computer science at Purdue University in West Lafayette, Indiana. So I also received a scholarship and obtained a Masters in English from Purdue University; and later, I received my Ph.D. in Educational Leadership from the University of Southern Mississippi in Hattiesburg, Mississippi.
Alicia: Back to, like when you started school, did you start in like the lowest grade like Pre-K or Kindergarten, and was your school integrated?
Aunt Delores: We did not have Kindergarten or Preschool. Everybody started with first grade. In some of the rural schools in our area, they had like different grade classifications. They would have something like…They call it the Pre-Primer, Big Primer, etc., which would led to first grade. But when I started school in Louisville, which was the town or the city, we only had first grade. We had grades 1 through 6 with our elementary school. And, yes. The schools were totally segregated then.
As a matter of fact, schools stayed segregated in the town where I grew up until 1970. They forced desegregation of all of the schools in Mississippi. As a matter of fact, my high school diploma says Louisville Colored (Negro) High School, and that was in 1966, the mid-sixties. So, that’s how the made the distinction between Black school and the White School was made.
Alicia: That’s interesting. Umm…Describe your parents’ formal education.
Aunt Delores: My father finished the 3rd grade. My mother completed the 11th grade. However, they both were very very intelligent, very resourceful people. My father had a remarkable memory. In fact, I did not know that my father could not read until I was in the 8th grade. He watched television all the time. He subscribed to 5 different newspapers. I had no idea that he could not read, but he could memorize key phrases. He was very good, of course, with numbers, as is often the case with people that cannot read. So, they did not have a lot of formal education, but they were very very resourceful people.
Alicia: What information do you recall about your parents’ lives and their lifestyles, and what did your parents do for a living?
Aunt Delores: First of all, my father worked for a number of years at a lumber mill, and I remember when the Black workers were paid 50 cents an hour. The White workers were paid 75 cents an hour.I remember when everyone got a raise to one dollar an hour, and that was like astronomical. You’re talking $9 dollars a day working from 7–4. My mother worked as a domestic housekeeper, basically a maid. And then, about the early 1960s, both of them got better paying jobs at a factory, a company that built farming equipment similar to the Caterpillar tractors. So, when my father got a job there, and that was a tremendous booster because I remember his first paycheck was like about eighty dollars a week, which was doubled from what he’d been making for many many years. And while my mom worked in the office area, she was making something like 35–40 dollars a week, which was more than double what she’d ever made. So, they were very hardworking…They led a typical Southern African American kind of lifestyle. We always had our own home. Ever since I can remember, we lived in one place. My father was buying the home. We always had plenty to eat. I was never hungry. We had very decent clothing. So we were probably poor, but so was everyone else. And so, it didn’t seem as a surprise or anything. They were really hardworking people. We never went without any of the basic essentials.
Alicia: Okay, I know you kind of touched on this earlier, but I didn’t know if you wanted add anything. So, my next question was, “what was life like for as a Black female growing up in the South?” Is there anything else you wanted to add?
Aunt Delores: When you hear the phrase, “it takes a whole village to raise a child,” I can truly identify with that. Growing up, especially in a small town where I grew up, everything was very community and church oriented. It was a very nurturing environment. We received support from everybody in the community. It was not uncommon for you to receive instructions or to be disciplined by anyone in the community as long as it was in a caring way. There was not the hostility that we often experience today amid our communities. As a child growing up…I never encountered things like gangs or a child being beaten by another child because of a pair of shoes or a jacket someone was wearing. I never attended a funeral of a classmate, gunned down by another classmate. There were occasional school yard fights and even some bullying, but nothing like what kids experience today. Even though segregation was alive and well, the community banded together in a different sort of way than it does in present times.
Alicia: So you talked about community. That was going to be the next question (What was your community like growing up?). So, how did race relations and the Civil Rights movement affect your upbringing?
Aunt Delores: I grew up in the late 50’s to late 60’s. It was during the time when Emmett Till, the young Black male from Chicago was killed up in the Delta area. And I can just remember my father constantly telling my brothers, you know: “Be careful. Do not look at white women. Do not speak to them.” Because it would be like a death wish. My parents were not negative. They did not teach us hatred or resentment. They taught us respect for all adults, but it was very clear that it was a different…I can remember not being able to go into the front door of a doctor’s office. We always had to go into the side door. I grew up in the time of the Colored and the White water fountains and the Colored and the White bathrooms. I grew in a time where there was one movie theatre in the town where we lived, but we were separated. We had to sit upstairs, and the whites sat downstairs. (Chuckles) To be honest, I can remember us pouring drinks down on them, because that was our lil’ way of protesting. And then, the manager would come upstairs, and make us all leave.
It was time (in) 1964, Philadelphia, Mississippi, which is Neshoba County, where my great grandparents grew up. That was the place where the three civil rights workers were killed. This was a critical time in the Civil Rights Movement. This was 30 miles from where we lived. So, I remember the “hush hush” and keeping us close by and the warnings to my brothers especially; because for young Black men, it was even more of a difficult time. The same is true today in many ways. So yes, race relations were very separate. There was a very unwritten code that you knew you had to abide by. And I remember even in schools during that time, when we as young people, you know like 15, 16 years old, we wanted to be a little more vocal. But I can remember my father always cautioning us about that. I remember the teachers telling us that the way around all of this was to get an education, to better yourselves, so that you could move forward. That opportunities were opening up for African Americans or Black kids. So, yes, it was a very tense time, but it was also a very very special time of growth, maturity and character development. Because you had to grow up, and you had to understand the world in which you lived, but you also had to be brave enough to move ahead and to want to look beyond that.
Alicia: What do you know about the family members that ummm…Well, this is based off of the spreadsheet of birth dates and the death dates that you gave me. I saw that several people went to California, but I see that there are also people in like D.C., so well…During the 1900s, that was the Great Migration, so they went to California and other places. So, what do you know about the family members that moved to California and D.C. and the other places during the mid-to-late 1900s? And do you think the historical nature of the time period influenced their decision to move? If so, how?
Aunt Delores: There were many people that made the conscious decision to stay in the South for various reasons because the South was their home. They didn’t want to uproot. However, there were some, who were brave enough to say, “Okay. There has to be a better way.”
In the early fifties, one of my mother’s sisters, Emma Cole Jernigan and her husband moved to California. Emma’s husband, Urial Jernigan, was a very out-of-the-box kind of thinker. As a matter of fact, growing up, I remember my mother saying that he was “different.” So he was a farmer for years, but they always seemed to have a little more than some of the others. And I’m not quite sure what else he did. I think he was a minister at one time, even had a lil’ church. But the decision to move as far away as California was unusual because we did not have any relatives in that area. I never knew “why,” no one ever really said, but he loaded up his whole family. Later the others that did not go with them initially went with them later. So it was a time to…many people just venturing anywhere they could out of the South and could afford to go. I remember they had a car. They had a 1950 Buick. A Buick was considered high end car. Also, I had aunts. Two of my mother’s sisters, Frances and Ruby, went to Chicago. Ruby went first. Ruby was a very adventurous girl. She was about two years younger than my mom, but she left home initially at about 14 and moved over into the Delta area and stayed for a while. And then, when she was about 15 or 16, she went to Chicago, on her own.
Alicia: Oh wow!
Aunt Delores: And later, Ruby’s younger sister went to Chicago because Ruby was there. They both got jobs and really stayed there most of their adult lives. It was the period in which they lived. Everybody was going somewhere else, anywhere to get away from the Jim Crow South, anywhere where they felt as if life that would be better. Of course, after many of them got there, life was not better in many aspects But nobody wanted to go back south to say, “We failed.” So, they stayed.
I think it’s what Isabel Wilkerson, I believe talks about in “The Great Migration,” which I read recently. And it tells the stories of three families that left the South for better opportunities. I think it was the time in which they lived. Everybody was seeking what they thought was a better way to live. And when they got there, many times, it was not any better, but it was in their minds better than living in the South. They had a few more freedoms, but history tells us even in the Northern states there was still a lot of racial separation. There was a lot of prejudice. America, itself, was and is a very racist nation. We still are plagued with some of the same things, but there were a few more opportunities for them.
Alicia: Tell me about your grandparents and great grandparents, and what were their lives were like?
Aunt Delores: I don’t remember much about my great grandparents. My mother’s mother died in July of 1950. Her name was Mary Frances Robinson Cole. I was not quite two years old. My grandfather, Robert Cole, died about 1958. I was about 10. I do remember a little about him because he used to have a wagon, a buckboard type wagon, and he had a mule. He would always come over every Spring and every Fall to plow the ground for my Dad’s garden. And I remember my brother’s and I getting on the back of that wagon, and we would ride half the way back to his house with him on that wagon. And then, we would jump off, and we would run back home. That was just like a big adventure. We used to call him Papa Cole. They were farmers. Later, they built a brick home in the town of Louisville. And at that time, black folks did not build brick homes.They would do well to have any kind of home, I remember the inside of the home had walls built from cedar wood. Now, that was a real big deal for that time. So, I just remember them saying that they saved their money, and they were doing well for poor Black people. Now, I do remember my dad’s mom a lil’ better because she lived ’til she was 83. Here name was Evie Thomas Smith. Some of my fondest memories are of her…because she lived within walking distance of where we lived. I would stay with her during the day in the summer while worked because my mom didn’t want me staying at home alone or only with my brothers at home. My mom wanted me to be in what she considered more protective environment. So, when my mom would leave every morning for work, I would walk up to my grandmother’s house, and I would stay until my mom picked me up. My grandfather on my dad’s side and my grandmother were not legally married. His name was Will Worthy. I do know a whole lot about him;but you know, their lives were probably typical in that were products of their generation. My grandfather, Will Worthy, was from Noxapater, MS, which is also in Winston County.
Aunt Delores: Your next question was regarding my great-grandfather on my mom’s side of the family. Hiram and Liza Cole were their name. The only thing I know about them is what was printed in our 1987 family reunion historical data. Unfortunately, I don’t think my mom even knew much about them. And I know this is not part of your interview, but I’m just really glad you’re doing this because I wish I had done this when my mom was still alive. And maybe I could’ve gotten a little more information.
Alicia: Take a moment to think about the oldest relative that you are aware of. What do you know about him or her?
Aunt Delores: Okay. My oldest relative actually only died a few months ago in May of 2015 at a hundred and six. She was my mother’s oldest sister. Her name was Bessie Willie Cole. She taught for years in the one room schoolhouse era until the earlier 1960s. It took her a long time to get her college degree because she could only go to school during the summer months because she had to work during the school year. And then for years until my grandmother and grandfather died — -my grandfather died, as I said, in 1958 — -she was really their caregiver. She never married. She never had any children; and until she was in her early nineties, she worked a garden. She had a garden in her yard — -flower garden and vegetable garden — -and she was very very active. Currently, I have one aunt alive to date; her name is Ora Bell Smith. She is a hundred and one, and she’s my daddy’s oldest sister. She lives in a nursing home in Meridian, MS. She is one of the oldest residents there and has lived there since 1982. She can hold a pretty good conversation with you on most days, but she does suffer from dementia. She is my dad’s oldest relative, who is still alive.
Alicia: Has she ever told you anything?
Aunt Delores: My Aunt Ora Bell lived for years with my grandmother (Evie Thomas Smith), with whom I spent a lot of time with. Aunt Ora Bell never married. She never had children. In that day and time, if you never married, of course, you were considered an old maid. You know she was very quiet. She never talked a lot about her life because life to her was just very simple. She spent her life going to work, coming home, maybe going to church; but in terms of experiences, I know she never left the South. She never traveled probably more than 50 miles from her home. Her life was very confined to the Louisville area.
Alicia: Describe a life lesson you’ve learned from an older member of the family.
Aunt Delores: Probably the lesson I learned most was from my grandmother (Evie Thomas Smith), who, like I said, lived until she was 83, and the lesson I learned most from her was probably how to be resourceful: how to take what you have and just make the very best you can of it. I remember watching her to cook on her wooden stove. I learned how to make what she called “flapjacks,” or you may call them pancakes now. She sometimes called them “sweet bread.” She was afraid of gas. She would say, “Oooh, I’m afraid this gas is going to blow up.” Even after my dad bought her a gas stove, she would not use it. She would always cook on that wooden stove. She died in August of 1978 and spent the last five years in a nursing home; but even into the early seventies, she would not use that gas stove. She just said, “she just wasn’t gone do it.” She would never complain about not having anything. That was the one thing I remembered most of all about her. She never complained. She never felt deprived of anything — if she did, she did not make a big deal about it
Alicia: If you could drop your things at this very moment and travel to one place in Mississippi, where would it be and why? And what do you like most about Mississippi?
Aunt Delores: Well, quite frankly, I’ve probably seen most of the places I would ever want to see in Mississippi. I’ve lived here my entire life, so I’ve been from one end of the state to the other, from the Gulf Coast area to the Tennessee line, as well as, to the Alabama line. So, there’s not really any place special in Mississippi that I would really feel compelled to see. I’m just comfortable where I am. What I like most about Mississippi is probably the fact that we have come a long way in this state, but there’s still a lot more to be done, as there is in our country. As I’ve gotten older, I’ve come to understand that Mississippi, while it has its nuances and a lot of negative things, you can go to any state or place, and it would be the same. So, Mississippi, to me, is home. There’s a slow pace here, but I’m comfortable here. I have seen a lot of growth in this state, but there’s a lot more to be done. But I see it as being no different than any place else in the United States quite frankly. I don’t know a state that I’ve ever been in, whereas there were not some things that were not so positive. I think the biggest problem with our state is that it’s always considered, educationally and economically, on the very bottom, and that has a lot to do with the embedded segregated kind of attitudes that are still very prevalent here.
Alicia: Take a moment to think about your favorite family tradition. Why is it your favorite? What is the significance of it?
Aunt Delores: I think my favorite family tradition continues to be the family gatherings. We have some special gathering on holidays, especially on Christmas. This has always been a traditional part of my growing up. I have two first cousins who are sisters, who live here in the Jackson area, and we really work together. As a matter of fact, we pulled together the family reunion in 1987, and we had another one in 2000. We’re looking at pulling together another one really soon. I think it’s a time to share, and it’s a time to just realize who you are. And if you don’t pass down your history to your children and their children and their children’s children, it will get lost. We have a lot more history among African Americans. We need to take the time to write it down.
Alicia: Can you tell me a little bit more about the family reunion in 1987 when the family compiled the family history book?
Aunt Delores: Well, this is something again that my two first cousins, Marilyn Triplett and Maretta Carter, and I put together prior to 1987. We had never had an official family reunion. We had often got together in Louisville when all of our parents were living, but we decided to see if we could just pull a larger group together. And this was for my grandmother’s and my grandfather’s family on my mother’s side of the family. Again, we wanted to just begin to try to put things in writing. We had plans initially to do this 10 years, but, of course, we did not. We didn’t do the next one until 2000. And we haven’t done another one. So, we’re a little bit off our mark. Our family is getting smaller; so perhaps your generation needs to spearhead the next one.
Alicia: Now, the next questions are going more so into my research, so think about the phrase “strong black family”? What does that mean to you?
Aunt Delores: The (phrase) “strong black family” is a very significant phrase to me because it is in strength that we are able to survive. And the Black family has always had to quote on quote “be strong” because it’s probably the one group of people that were so disenfranchised from the very beginning. No other race of people were removed from their home place in such a cruel inhuman way than the African was. I mean just snatched up, herded like cattle onto a ship (with) deplorable conditions, and brought to a total foreign, different country. You know back then slaves weren’t indentured servants, but they came under a different kind of arrangement. With the strong black family concept, there is something very embedded in the word that in strength we survive. In strength, we’re able to overcome. So, we’ve had to be many many things; and to me, this is critical to the survival of the family in that you have to have, um, you have to be rooted in strength and in endurance.
Alicia: What is the role of Black women in the household? How important are they?
Aunt Delores: Well, I think this is very connected to the question before when you talk about the strong black family. Black women have had to assume the leadership role, in many cases, as the head of the household simply because there was no Black man present. Now, there were a lot of reasons, and there continues to be a lot of “quote” reasons why there is no Black man present. This goes back to the slave concept. It’s the way the white master kept the family disenfranchised by making sure that there was no male dominance in the family; and if the family got to be too strong, then it was separated. You were sold off, and the black woman had assume the responsibility of both male and female. I think that women just by their sheer nature…We’re nurturing. We’re giving. We’re caring, and this is not to say that the male is not. But I think that we have been the thread that has kept families together. There’s an old saying that, “behind every influential and successful man, there is a strong woman,” and I think, or course, we can add the Black phrase to that because we’ve had to…We have been forced to perhaps be…in charge. Sometimes, you hear the phrase, even today, “the angry Black woman.” Whenever we assert ourselves, we’re considered angry. We’re not angry. We’re survivors because we’ve had to be survivors.
“…We have been the thread that has kept families together,”
Alicia: In your opinion, how important is soul food to the Black family? Is soul food enhancing or detrimental to the Black life?
Aunt Delores: Well,…I don’t even know if I like the term to be completely honest. This goes back to a real rich tradition, in that sometimes the only thing that the Black family had to eat were the cast offs that the white family did not want. So, we got stuck with the chitlins, the pig feet, the neck bones, the ham hock. We got stuck with all of this because that was not the best part of the animal, but I do think that soul food is just a part of a regional tradition. I grew up in a traditional Black family. We ate certain soul foods. We also had a family garden. My dad grew vegetables, so we had a lot of vegetables. Our diet did not necessarily just consist of what is quote on quote considered “soul food.” Of course, there was fried chicken…I don’t even know if that’s considered soul food. That’s everybody’s food as far as I’m concerned. You know there are some things: collard greens, black eyes peas, etc. and things like that. We end up saying that this is soul food. Yes, I do think that the way food is prepared can be detrimental to our lives.
I think we can eat certain things, but we have to learn how to eat it in moderation. And we have to learn how to prepare it in a different way. Everything does not have to be fried in vegetable oil. It doesn’t have to be the fatty part of , you know, of the animal that we choose to eat. Bacon is…Everybody eats bacon, but you know again, I think it’s in the way it’s prepared, and it should be eaten in moderation. I think that it is detrimental to us when we do not vary our diet and when we over indulge, anything can become detrimental whether it’s soul food, or it could be even the prime rib or the best part or the best cut of meat. Anything can become detrimental when we overdo it. Of course, there are families that don’t even eat soul food. Everybody relishes that fact that some soul food is often a basic part of the diet. Any food can be detrimental to our lives if we do not practice moderation.
Alicia: Have you watched the movie The Help? That’s one of my sources. If so, how does it relate to our family experience?
Aunt Delores: Yes. I’ve seen the movie The Help; and yes, there are many parts of The Help that I could relate directly to my mom, who as I told you earlier, was a maid for a number of years for a very prominent white family in Louisville. The Help was made for entertainment and television. But there is a lot of truth in the way that the maids were treated. Of course, with the families that my mom worked for, there were no separate bathroom. However, on the other hand, many of the racist and demeaning actions and attitudes depicted were very real.
Again, I think that the story was exaggerated for publication. Yet, there was a lot of truth in what you would saw. How does it relate to our family experience? I think any family that worked under any servant kind of role, especially in sixties, fifties, family would’ve experienced some of these things. As I told you my first experience was babysitting with a lil’ girl that was probably the age of the lil’ girl that was featured in The Help that the lady cared for. When in public, her mother didn’t want her to relate to me in a loving sort of way by hugging me or kissing me. But when we were alone at their house, it was okay because this was in the confines of their home. But they didn’t want you to feel like you were really cared for. As a rule of thumb, you were there to meet their needs.
Alicia: Describe the importance of spirituality to our family today and to our ancestors then.
Aunt Delores: Well, I remember as a child growing up, the church and the school were the centers of your life because Black people really didn’t have a whole lot else to relate to. And I think it is important because it is the foundation for our upbringing. It creates a moral sense. When the family structure was really not perfect when we were growing up, the church and the school were synonymous in being places where you learned how to do things right, how to treat others, how to be on your best behavior. If you didn’t learn it at school or at home rather, you learned it at church.The church reflects the society in which we live. So, when we allow our basic fabric of our lives to unravel, then we have nowhere else to go. I think that’s why we have so much destruction among our people. We’ve always had it, but I think it’s more so now than ever because we’ve lost that faith. We no longer have it in our homes. We don’t have it in our schools, and many of the churches are very polite now. Everybody wants everybody to feel very good and we don’t stress the real things that we should stress. But I think it is critical. I think that if you don’t have that base, the old saying “train a child up in the way he should go; and when he’s old, he will not depart and come back to it”…I strongly believe in that. When I went to college, for a while I didn’t go to church. Because I was away from home, I didn’t really have anybody to make me go; but after a while, I started feeling very empty. So I started getting up and going to church without anybody reminding me. So, that’s part of growing.
Alicia: Is there any other pertinent information about our family or your life that you would like to share with me?
Aunt Delores: Yes. I would like to share a couple of things. One is that, as a child growing up, my brothers and I were taught to work and to get an education, and that that was the only way we could better ourselves. There were four children in our family; and probably from the time we were about ten to twelve years old, we had some type of job. My brothers delivered newspapers. They worked on Saturdays, shining shoes at the shoe repair shop. I worked babysitting. I used to wash dishes on Saturdays in this lil’ café in our town for three dollars a day from seven in the morning to seven in the evening. In fact, I made three dollars, and then, I made 50 cents in the evenings babysitting. So, by the end of the week, I had five dollars and 50 cents. So, I could get a dress for two dollars. I could get a pair of shoes for a dollar fifty cents, you know. My siblings and I were taught very early to work. Even though it didn’t seem like much, it was a lot. The other thing is that not all Black families were deprived in the sense of value or a sense of worth. We were limited, yes. We didn’t have a lot, but nobody had a lot. So, we were all okay. Now, there was always someone that had a lil’ more that somebody else, we all felt a sense of community that I don’t think we have now. I think that we are a very diverse, creative family. I think that, when you look at the history of my grandparents, your great-grandparents, and even my great-great parents, there was always a strong work ethic that ran throughout the fabric of the family. We’ve had some things that we’ve had to work with, but that is the case with every family. So, I think that what you’re doing now, as a young person, researching your family history…will give you a better idea of your background and who you are today. It’s in your genes. I think there are some genetic things, and I think there are some thing pass from generation to generation, and you’re wondering “why am I doing this?,” “why do I wanna be like this?” I think, as you research and think about your family, there is a reason for that. I think your mom is a great influence. When you look at your mom’s side of the family, I think that you’ll find some of the same kinds of things. It may be different, but there’s some similarities. And I’m just real proud of you and what you’re doing, and I see myself in you. I see you as going so much further just because of the opportunities that you will have. So, you keep your head on straight.
Alicia: I will.
Aunt Delores: And as the older people used to say, “don’t settle for less than what you think is the very best for you.” And make your own decisions, and I think you’ll do great.
Alicia: Okay. Thank you.
This project means a lot to myself and to my family. As I have discussed the elements of this project with my Aunt Delores, she has expressed the family’s high intrigue with my ancestral research, as no other individual of the family has delved into the family’s story since the reunion in 1987 — until now. This project has created a fresh perspective on life and family for me. Through the eyes of my Aunt Delores, I see the drive and resilience has held my family and the African American community together. As far as I can remember, faith, frugality, and future has been the caption of my life. Emptiness is viewed as plenty, and setbacks are viewed as potential comebacks. Indeed, these are the themes that illuminate the lives of my family members.
I truly enjoyed conducting this interview with my Aunt Delores. She was extremely informative, cooperative, descriptive and humorous. While the interview unfolded beautifully, a face to face interaction would have been even more effective in telling my family’s story, but the three hundred eighty-nine mile distance between us has temporarily inhibited that. As result, if I were to conduct another interview, I would do it in person and ensure that reliable technology is accessible to capture every moment. On the other hand, if I were the interviewee, I would emulate my Aunt Delores by candidly describing what it was like growing up in Jackson and how my experiences an the experiences of those before me has molded me to become the person I am today and the person I hope to become in the future. All in all, this entire project has encouraged me to cherish my ancestry, to develop a critical, skeptical eye of history, and to be open to new ideas and historical facts that maybe be contradictory to my current knowledge.
