Did we forget to evolve our personalities?
Be the lion.
Growing up in a typical Indian household, I was taught that life is a race, and you need to work hard. I am grateful for that as it gave me the strength to face any issues and never lose hope. But I was also afraid growing up, that I need to make a place in this world to matter, to feel safe, to be seen.
That desire to matter, made me a good contender in the race of life but also pulled me away from evaluating what I am hoping to feel when I achieve this goal? I always knew I want to be successful and somehow believed that meeting that would make me content.
Then a few months ago, I read the book Sapiens: A brief history of Humankind by Yuval Noah Harari. There are many things to love in that book, but something that just stayed with me was the author’s reference to the lion’s and man’s evolution over millions of years.
Some context for anyone who has not read the book, the author explains that evolution is the core of everything. Millions of years ago, humans were at the bottom of the food chain, and because of that relied on scrapes from other animals and were scared for their lives. That built up a lot of insecure and defensive personality traits in humans. Yuvel uses the example of the ‘lion,’ being the king of the jungle, knows and believes in his strength. Years of being on top of the food chain have built a strong personality, and you can see that in the way a lion moves.
Because of cognitive evolution, humans invented tools, the fire that brought us to the top of the food chain in a short period, and we never got the opportunity to develop the personality traits that come from years of leadership and confidence. From inside, we are still the scared, insecure living being. Yuval further writes that this is the reason for wars in today’s world.
When I read that, I couldn’t stop thinking about it. I could relate that to our simple modern lives as well. We are all in this race to get to the top of our careers as fast as possible. But something we should think about is are we even ready for it? What are we expecting will happen once we reach the top? Are we prepared to embrace the confidence, the strength, and, most of all, the responsibility that comes with being on top?
Instead of always feeling insecure, maybe giving us the time to learn something and build confidence is what we need. Instead of trying to get to the top as quickly as possible, we need to develop ourselves, so we are ready when we reach there. We will know our strengths and weaknesses. We need to take the time to pause, reflect on what we have achieved.
One way I try that is by simply asking myself, Am I safe? Am I doing well? If yes, I don’t need to be in a fight or flight mode.
We have evolved into the ‘lions’ in the food chain, and now we need to evolve our personality.
Please read this book! You are gonna love it.
