And For My Next Trick, the Most Taboo Sentence in the English Language: “I don’t have goals.”

Grandma, you better grab your cross. It’s ol’ Idle Hands himself. ~ source

It’s secular blasphemy on par with an outright admission of guilt, but it’s true.

If I’m being genuinely honest with myself, I do not have goals. I truly never have, ever since I was a kid. Not really.

Cue the horrified gasps, screaming babies, and pearl-clutching.