Fuck Niches
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Fuck Niches

Local Man Needs To Explain How Charles Manson Dominated His Spotify Wrapped

“His older stuff is really good guys, trust me!”

Area man under fire for posting his Spotify wrapped results displaying his affinity for the swastika clad leader of the infamous murder hippies known as the Manson family is being forced to explain himself to his very few remaining friends. Charles Manson, for those of you not in the know, received some bad press back in 1969 after being responsible for the horrific violent murder of a deeply pregnant woman and a bunch of her friends.

Manson’s racially inspired language and fiery impassioned pleas to ignite a race war across Hollywood led to innocent people getting hurt, which really detracts from the quality of his music, which is still shockingly available to stream on Spotify, where he averages over 35,000 monthly listeners. Next time somebody claims cancel culture has gotten out of hand, feel free to link them to Manson’s “Look At Your Game, Girl” which currently sits at over 3 million streams worldwide.

Some people continue to support Manson, arguing that his music is so good that it warrants continued patronage, beyond his batshit antics.

“That was decades ago, bro. Get over it!” Say some of Manson’s fans.

“He didn’t get the swastika tattoo until after he made my favorite album” say others.

“This can’t be the same mf that made Commemoration” Is a common refrain among those struggling to cope with the unbridled evil on display from their favorite musician.

The metrics say Spotify wrapped only accounts for music played between January 1st and October 31st, so Halloween to New Years Eve is peak cringe binge time, allowing you to listen to all your favorite deeply problematic artists such as Charles Manson, Kanye West, and Chris Brown, three equally bad individuals, no questions asked.

Looking for something that won’t incinerate your social status for next year’s Spotify wrapped? Try listening to one hundred and thirty seven straight hours of Shrimp Dust, an improv comedy band I made in the midst of a psychedelic induced stupor. Or check out the political comedy podcast Dumb People With Terrible Ideas, hosted by Eric Gray, featuring some of my own comedic writing!

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Articles covering all the topics I love (too many to list). No niches, no headings… just writing and sharing.

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TeeJay Small

Retired baby, alive from natural causes, secretly 3 comedic influences in a trench coat