Our featured artist is Larissa Kwong Abazia (@LarissaLKA on Twitter). She is a 2.5 generation Chinese American pastor whose work centers around building relationships within and around church communities. She is anxiously awaiting and striving toward God’s beloved community. On the hardest days, building a future in which her son and those who experience the world like him can thrive, keeps her going.
Hope, peace, joy and love?
I’m too damn tired from the waiting.
Many of us know what it feels like to hear the words, “Not right now. Wait just a bit longer. We’ve got to be strategic about this. Your turn will come.” And if we don’t hear the words, it’s body language that conveys the same plea…without nerve for actually naming the submission that will soon be required.
Wait. Just. A. Bit. Longer.
Until then, we’re left fighting for the scraps underneath the table. At least we can have something to keep us on the brink of starvation as we wait. And, if the powers that be are lucky, we will fight one another and leave the system in place, its virus unscathed and pulsing with vibrant life.
For the most part, I am thankful that we believe in a God who is patient and kind. This God knows each one of us so deeply that we will never be released from a loving embrace. I don’t want to let go of this God just as much as I trust that this God never wants to let go of me.
But people need to let go of the idea that we’ve got time. Somehow the understanding of God’s providence has allowed far too many of us to dodge what is unfolding right before our eyes. What has been unfolding for centuries.
“God has a plan,” they say.
Why do we wait for God to move us as if we are chess pieces on a board? Why do we assume that there is a plan, one plan that will unfold whether or not we engage? Why do we accept passivity over being woke every single moment…no matter how painful?
The Lord is not slow about his promise, as some think of slowness, but is patient with you, not wanting any to perish, but all to come to repentance.
2 Peter 3:9
If God is patient with anything, it’s our ability to fully embrace avoidance and denial. It’s a God who can watch humanity mess up this whole world by killing our neighbors, imprisoning those who scare us, raping the land as if it was ours to take, denying access to resources for those who lack the most basic of necessities, inciting violence and war, and, at the end of the day, worrying about our own needs rather than the beloved community that Christians so readily proclaim.
Our patient God remains on the borders, boundaries and margins of these human made disasters alongside those whom we drive there. God waits for individuals and their communities to proclaim complicity.
This God, despite all of our disappointed be-ing, remains with and for all of us.
Therefore, silence at any moment is complicity. It’s our sin, amplified.
We can’t look to others to fix the disaster that we have created.
Don’t daydream in this nightmare. There isn’t any more time.