Our Obsession with Winning
We are forgetting to actually enjoy it
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Your palms are sweating, your mind in a state of hyper-focus, you are oblivious to the world around you, only concerned with the single goal in front of you. These are the moments you live for and train for. Every day is brutal and relentless, but worth the effort in these moments of glory and triumph when you prove to the world you are something great.
Everyone likes winning, regardless if you think you are competitive or not. The problem is that we have forgotten what winning actually means. It’s not about prizes, trophies, and sponsorships. Sure those are great side benefits if you are trying to make a profession out of something, but the the euphoria from winning comes from the intrinsic knowledge that you left everything you had on the figurative playing field.
When we lose, we don’t get upset about the actual loss, we get upset that we made mistakes and know we should have taken a victory, but didn’t live up the standards we set for ourselves. I know this because it happens often. Yet on the few occasions I lose and gave it my all, I still feel pretty great because I know my opponents were simply better than me and they give me inspiration to improve. I know I did everything within my capabilities to win, so I don’t feel crushed when I don’t. I now have a higher goal to work towards to get even better.
The same can be said about winning unopposed. Sure we may win, but the feeling we get is empty because it wasn’t even a challenge. We can tell by the competition that our opponent had no chance and so we don’t feel the same satisfaction. There was no thrill, just the same methodical feeling we get during training and preparation. The true glory of winning comes when we meet a common opponent on the field who makes us work for our victory. Even as fans, we love watching close competitions that keep us on the edge of our seats, but one-sided competitions often lead to leaving early or turning the channel. It’s boring and nobody wants to watch it, trust me, the feeling is the same for the competitors.
I grew up thinking I had no interest in competition, only to discover a competitive streak when I joined the Marine Corps. I realized I really loved to compete, but I never developed an obsession with winning. I never understood why people would cheat the game just to win, when for me playing the game was the whole point. I knew Marines who would sneak a shortcut on our 3 mile physical fitness test to get a better time. Sure it helps you get promoted, but what happens in 6 months when we are in combat and have to run 5 miles in 80 lbs. of gear. They were the assholes that couldn’t keep up because they cared more about winning than playing by the rules.
This isn’t claiming that you should follow all rules, there are some shitty rules out there that should be broken and then changed. I’m arguing that we shouldn’t do so just to claim a victory, because then we are just missing the point. We are denying the joy we feel as humans when we are pushing ourselves to the limit, being mentally, physically, and emotionally challenged by an opponent. It’s the purest relationship I can think of between two fellow human beings. We see this and experience this in the unfiltered acts of sportsmanship, when victor and loser meet in hugs and smiles, knowing that it was a great game and both left everything they had on the battlefield.
I believe we are all competitive, we just have a misconstrued idea of what competition is. Most people think they just like winning, and we label them as competitive people while labeling ourselves as non-competitive because we don’t care about winning. Yet I hope you realize that as humans we are all competitive because that is what makes us feel alive. We must simply embrace the challenge and stimulation of improving ourselves and the team around us. As long as we give everything we’ve got, we’ve already won.
