Own Your Comfort Zone (And Face the Unknown)
There is a common saying that I’ve heard many times growing up:
“You’ve got to get out of your comfort zone.”
We usually hear that from someone as a form of advice when we’re feeling stuck or unmotivated or nervous about something. That’s great, thank you. It didn’t help at all.
Not to sound so harsh, I always appreciate someone’s advice in times of need, even if it seems completely useless to me at the time. It’s the thought that counts. I will politely hear you out and keep looking for advice :) Maybe that advice will come in handy later on.
I also feel that people who jump to that as the answer have already been through it. They experienced something you haven’t (yet) so they have a definition attached to it that means something different to them.
When people jump to that as the solution, getting out of your comfort zone, it sounds so vague and scary and unknown. That doesn’t sound like it’s going to solve any of my problems and I’m already feeling lost. No, I want to stay in my comfort zone and do things here!
Don’t we all?
Our comfort zone is our happy place. The place within ourselves where we feel unthreatened based upon the physical environment around us. Everything within our comfort zone is familiar to us and it’s safe.
So how is getting out of your comfort zone helpful?
Is it necessary?
I’ve learned a few things over the years of entering adulthood and one thing I do finally understand, is that staying in your comfort zone will get boring. You don’t get far by staying in one place, do you?
Out of Your Comfort Zone and Into the Unknown
A couple other versions of this notorious saying that I’ve heard include, “get out of your comfort zone and into the unknown” and “the best way to stay in your comfort zone is to get our of your comfort zone”. That second one was just an oxymoron to me, at first.
When people keep saying “we need to get out of our comfort zones” it ends up sounding like it’s a negative thing after a while. Like anything that is repeated too often, it begins to lose its value, its true meaning. Everyone has a comfort zone, it’s human nature. Everyone has a variety of things that they could categorize into what’s comforting to them.
The more those words were repeated to me, the more resistance I had to them. It did end up having the negative stigma attached to it. It made me feel pressured to do things I wasn’t sure I wanted to do or not.
Have you tried jumping into something, both feet first, not knowing at all how hard it might be? Not knowing if you’re going to fail or not? If you’re going to like it or not? If it’s going to work for you or not? If it’s going to be worth it or not?
This might be a shot in the dark, but if you have, I’ll bet it was not a comfortable moment for you.
This is what we call the ‘unknown’. This is the scary place outside of your comfort zone. The realm of endless opportunities or regrets. However you decide to look at it can have a major impact on your future.
Fun fact, when starting something new -a job, going to a new school, an online course, moving to a new state or country, nobody knows what they’re doing. Everyone get’s that ‘what if’ feeling.
What if I don’t like it?
What if I can’t handle it?
What if I fail?
What if I don’t want to stick with it?
What if…you thought about those questions with a positive twist?
What if the more you learn about it, the more you end up loving it?
What if you have mentors and people that are supporting you every step of the way?
What if you have professionals and academic resources that teach you how to succeed?
What if…that last question isn’t even necessary if you’ve gotten that far?
Think about this, when has ‘jumping into the unknown’ been a scene from a horror movie? (The only exception to that is if you’re going to a haunted house for the first time, but I digress.)
You made a choice to start something new based off of something that caught your interest. Something intrigued you enough and convinced you to make that jump into the unknown, so eventually you can know it. So, the unknown isn’t completely unknown, really, it’s just unfamiliar.
The unknown isn’t a scary place of darkness where we have no answers or solutions or exit. It’s actually the exact opposite. It’s a place filled with endless opportunities, all the answers we need and all of the solutions to our problems; as long as we aren’t afraid to look for them.
Hone Your Zone
Our comfort zones are created subconsciously based on our experiences that had a big enough impact on our brains. These can be some of the best, most cherished memories you have, something you created, a place you’ve been, maybe even something you envisioned in your imagination. Your brain is constantly trying to protect you, so by creating a metaphorical safe-space, or zone, you have an ‘escape’ for your brain in moments of stress or overwhelm to help keep you calm.
When you’re about to do something or start something new that involves stepping out of your comfort zone, keep in mind that you are always changing, therefore your comfort zone going to change, too.
When I was a little girl, my comfort zone was this imaginary, dark forest with glowing purple flowers and plants illuminating everything. It was beautiful, I was surrounded by my favorite color and nothing could hurt me. Another place that ended up being a space of comfort for me growing up was a very popular book store I went to a lot. Simply the thought of being there would comfort me. (It still does to this day.)
Today, my comfort zone(s) have expanded. My imaginary place of happiness is a cute, cozy breakfast nook with the morning sun shining in, plants hanging from above and on any surface a plant can fit, with the smell of fresh coffee, surrounded by books, my laptop and my kitties. Along with two book stores that I actually live close to.
It doesn’t matter what your comfort zone consists of. It doesn’t matter if it’s real or imaginary. As long as you give it the opportunity to grow with you, you never actually have to get out of your comfort zone.
We’re meant to experience new things. That’s learning! That’s growing! And the scarier and more uncomfortable it might seem, the more impactful that experience is going to be.
If you’re on the edge thinking about jumping into some unknown or “unfamiliar” as I mentioned before, I suggest honing your comfort zone. Write down the little things that you enjoy, that bring you happiness. Think of a favorite place that you’ve been or even create a place with all of those joyous things in it together. Write it, draw it, paint it, even just think it if you want.
Just like anything in life, leave space for change. As you learn and change, your likes and comfort zone will too. As long as you keep that awareness of yourself, you’ll start to notice those anxiety levels dissipate. It will help you trust yourself and your intuition better. By creating that safe space, that comfort zone, you’re trusting yourself already!
The rest is still unknown, yes, but it’s exciting. The only thing the unknown is holding for you is further opportunity.
So don’t be afraid to walk into the unknown with your head held high, ready for all of the opportunities it has for you. The unknown isn’t a scary, dark, endless closet. It’s a closet that secretly holds all of the successes in the world; you just have to trust in it, and yourself.
Thanks for reading!
Be kind, stay strong and live your beautiful life to the fullest!
I always appreciate comments and feed back!
