Stuck in a Dilemma? Try this.
We all get stuck at times, trying to decide between one option and another. There are dilemmas that can only be solved by making an informed decision, but there are also dilemmas that can not be solved — they can only be managed. That’s where “Polarity Management” is a terrific tool. Use it to get unstuck at home and at work. Here I offer some explanation with an instructional video.
Think with me for a moment about two kinds of problems.
The first pits one alternative against another. For example
- Should my next car be black, or white?
- Should I have dinner at 4 or 6:00?
- Should I put on these jeans or those shorts?
Each has an either/or choice. The problem is not ongoing. The choices are not interdependent. You evaluate the choices and make a decision.
The second is different because the problem is an ongoing dilemma, and the choices are interdependent.
- Should I focus on my wife or on myself?
- Should I save or should I spend?
- Should I focus on my individual rights or our community welfare?
In this case, where there is a Polarity to be Managed, making an either/or choice does not resolve the dilemma. The problem is ongoing and the two poles are interdependent.
If you are stuck with the first problem, you can use a Polarity Map to define the issues, but it always comes down to a choice. This, or that.
On the other hand, if it is an ongoing and interdependent dilemma, then a fleshed out “Polarity Map” will help you to manage your way along.
Here is a 4 minute video that will demonstrate how to use a Polarity Map so that you can effectively manage toward the upside of each pole.
That’s the key — Manage toward the Upside of Each Pole.
Now here is the polarity I’m thinking about today.
Should I look out for my own self interests, or should I put more time and energy into Loving Mother Earth?
Now there is a dilemma to manage. It is an ongoing challenge and both poles are interdependent.
There is an upside to each pole, and a downside. Human beings have not put enough energy into Loving Mother Earth and we are experiencing the early consequences of our neglect. It is going to get worse and we are headed for, what I call, THE BIG GRIEF.
Yes, we have to take care of ourselves.
Yes, we have to take care of Mother Earth.
It is not either/or, but both/and.
As helpful as Polarity Management is, its greatest benefit might well be found in elevating our consciousness beyond dualism to a more integrated worldview. Scott Fitzgerald is quoted as saying: “The test of a first-rate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposing ideas in mind at the same time and still retain the ability to function.”
Postscript
I am a Contemplative Environmentalist with a conviction that as we integrate our Environmentalism with our Spirituality, we will make wiser decisions about how to live in a loving relationship with Mother Earth.
I’ve written a little book of big ideas and I publish on Medium. You can learn more about me at andyatwood.com.
And, if you are seriously committed to Loving Mother Earth, follow me and know that I will follow you in return.
