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Are Your Dating Beliefs Becoming Self-Fulfilling Prophecies?

What you must understand about your brain and beliefs

Manj Bahra
3 min readMay 30, 2024


If you struggle with negative thoughts about dating AND want to find someone, today’s article is for you.

Because I get it.

Modern dating isn’t always easy, especially amongst a litany of apps, conflicting opinions, and let’s face it — some strange people out there.

So, feeling frustrated and disheartened is an entirely human response.

But the bigger danger is that these feelings can quickly become beliefs your brain treats as facts.

When this happens, you can RAPIDLY create self-fulfilling prophecies.

And don’t be fooled. This isn't pseudo-self-help — it's science.

Your brain has a function called the Reticular Activating System (RAS) that filters information to align with what you’re looking for while ignoring anything else.

You can try this for yourself right now.

Take a moment and look around the room you’re in. Spend the next 30 seconds focusing on everything red. Notice how many red objects you can find. Now, close your eyes and try to recall how many blue objects…



Manj Bahra
Modern Dating Wisdom

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