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The Hidden Force Holding You Back in Dating

An uncomfortable truth you need to hear

Manj Bahra
Published in
2 min readJan 21, 2025

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This might be uncomfortable, but it’s something you need to grasp if you are serious about your personal growth:

Your ability to change your life will be limited or expanded by your environment.

Environment = your physical surroundings and the people you spend the most time with.

This is the invisible hand shaping your decisions, habits, and mindset — every single day.

In EVERY area of your life — especially dating.

For example:

  • You can be the most eligible single, but if where you live is limited, what can you do?
  • You can want to find healthy love, but if your parents constantly pressure you to settle, you’ll make different choices.
  • You can want to break your self-sabotaging patterns, but if your closest friends are self-destructive, their habits will seep into yours.
  • You can want to shift your mindset about dating, but if everyone around you is bitter or blames others, that energy will influence you.

No matter how driven or ambitious you are, if this foundational part of your life isn’t aligned with who you want to be, it will be VERY difficult to…

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Modern Love
Modern Love

Published in Modern Love

Sharing the best in the science and psychology of 21st-century dating

Manj Bahra
Manj Bahra

Written by Manj Bahra

Helping you break the cycle and find love. Neuroscience & psychology-based advice. 3 million reads and counting!

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