Why Hot and Cold Behaviour Is So Attractive
A look at three psychological effects that make this age-old tactic so effective — even when you aren’t that interested
You meet someone, and there’s an instant connection. Within minutes of talking, you see how much you have in common. Neither of you can ignore the obvious chemistry nor escape the feeling that this might be something different. Numbers are exchanged, and you leave the interaction excited about what the future holds. The initial few weeks are blissful as you stay in contact, share funny memes, craft out flirty texts, and get to know each other better.
But after the initial honeymoon phase, things begin to change. Perhaps the conversations become shorter or the replies a little less frequent. Maybe the banter isn’t quite on the same level, or you feel like they have lost interest. Either way, you’re left feeling some doubt about whether you read into things too fast. Just when you think you did, that person shows a sign of interest to sway you back. Thus begins the cycle we all know so well — hopelessly trying to understand a person's hot and cold behaviour, overanalysing every tiny detail, and in the process, becoming even more attracted to them than we were at the start.
