POKEMON GO IS COMING TO KOREA TOMORROW
No one cares, daed gaem, right? WRONG
Tomorrow, the masses of South Korea will get to fully experience the augmented reality world of Pokémon Go, according to various reliable sources. And no one will give two fucks because the game is dead and because it’s so cold that the government literally sent a text message to every member of its 55 million population warning them of the freezing conditions and because everyone’s too busy playing real games like Lineage II: Revolutions, which literally earned over $175 million dollars in a single month. And because Pokémon is for kids and maybe we could have all given Pokémon Go a chance if it had released within the 2016 calendar year here in Korea, but every aching month in its failure to launch left us disappointed, disillusioned and extremely disdainful of other countries like IRAN and NORTH KOREA who were considered more worthy than us Gangnam style cretins.
So move on, nothing to see here, no one cares. Right?
Here at Gangnam Gamers we’re going to say WRONG. Here’s 3 reasons why:
(1) The franchise is iconic and Koreans have had no other way to get their fix
Let’s not forget that smartphones and PC bangs rule the roost here in Korea, while consoles or handhelds never really established a strong foothold. This is particularly important because the only way to experience Pokémon over the past decade has been handhelds or consoles, and since the two are of short supply, Koreans have not been able to satiate their appetite for Pikachu, Charmander and Squirtle (sorry Bulasaur, no one ever liked you) with other games. That means the void has not been filled except with super cute dolls found in doll crane machines that sadden the soul when your hard-earned dollar is lost in failure.
(2) Korea is a country of walkers with built-in resistance to cold
Yes, it is skin-numbingly cold outside. That doesn’t change the fact we all need to earn our hard earned dollars at our respective jobs and that most of us walk our asses to work. In fact, over 8 million commuters partake in the glory of South Korean mass transportation every day, making Seoul’s subway system one of the busiest in the world. So in other words, the cold will not stop us from our ambulatory constitutions. We will walk, we will wear our respectably cheap gloves that work with smartphones, and we will play Pokémon Go.
(3) It’s not THAT late. They didn’t even bring PvP in yet.
Is Korea the best e-sports country in the world? Is that even a question? Korea dominates almost every major e-sport, from Broodwar to League of Legends to Street Fighter V to Overwatch. If Pokémon Go introduces PvP into their game, which they most likely will, and if PoGo becomes an e-sport, which is also a high probability, then by the powers bestowed upon me by the postulates of transitivity I will forward the bold argument that Koreans will dominate the PoGo competitive scene.
So yes, SoKo PoGo fans. We all may be a bit salty, but tomorrow will be our day. Pokémon Go is coming and it’s going to be great. GET ON THAT HYPE TRAIN!
Have thoughts on PoGo and why it will succeed/fail in Korea? Leave us a comment below, or shoot us a message on our FB fanpage!
