Repentance From Sexual Deviancy and False Teachers
Painting gays with a broad, condescending brush
Recently, I received from a lady (let’s give her the pseudonym “Jane”) an email entitled “Message of Repentance.” Below is her condensed message and my verbatim response. We both did our best to treat each other with dignity.
Her Message
First, this precious lady was respectful to me. Jane took the time to address her issues with me in a private email. She avoided using “attacking” language. Jane even referred to me as “sir.”
Jane’s tone was civil and written in an instructive way (with her as the instructor). She also corresponded with certainty — no allowance for other possibilities.
Jane has very strong beliefs. She believes “being gay is a sin.” Furthermore, she is optimistic that “If you [gays] come to God in true repentance of heart, God will definitely change your heart.”
Jane believes that gays who prayed for healing — yet God didn’t change their homosexuality — have too quickly given up their faith. Such lack of dedication, Jane believes, produces gays who “adopt a homosexual identity and choose homosexual lifestyles.”
In contrast, Jane says, “There are many homosexuals who have found God and currently living a non-destructive heterosexual lifestyle.” In particular, Jane cites two celebrities (Becket Cook and Jackie Hill Perry) as examples of those who were formerly gay but are now apparently freed from their destructive homosexual lifestyle. Jane attributes such success because “they chose to give their lives unto God and not being true to themselves [i.e., not following their same-sex attraction].”
Jane does not affirm gay marriage. Rather, she says God “wants the best for us by creating sexual intimacy between monogamous sex differentiated people.” Jane adds that this type of marriage “reflects the true version of the marriage between Jesus and the church.”
Jane also believes the Bible verse that says, “homosexuals would not inherit the kingdom of God.”
Furthermore, Jane insinuates that I am a false teacher. She says, “the Bible warned us not to be deceive[d]” and that “there will be people twisting the word of God to suit their licentiousness.” Accordingly, there will be “false teachers to affirm the evil passions of their [gay] hearts.”
She respectfully offers me hope by saying, “I pray the Lord opens your heart to know the truth and seek him with true repentance.”
Jane’s final sentence was written in all caps and reads as follows:
“REMEMBER GOD LOVES YOU AND NO SEXUAL DEVIANCY CAN SEPARATE YOU FROM THE LOVE OF GOD. AMEN.”
My Verbatim Response
“Good evening [Jane],
Thank you for reading my articles. I greatly appreciate your respectful email to me. I also respect your kind desire to help me be my best person, through the love of Jesus. I wish the same for you.
I deeply love Jesus and committed my life to him in 1975. My life dramatically changed for the better. Jesus is my greatest love. My primary goal each day is to love others in the way that Jesus did.
You and I disagree about several areas: whether there is anything wrong with being gay, and whether people can lose their same-sex attraction. My definition of being ‘gay’ is: ‘a male who instinctively and enduringly is erotically and/or romantically attracted to certain attractive men.’ To be gay is to have an attraction — an attraction that was never sought and that never leaves.
I believe Jesus loves gays just as much as anyone else, and understands their challenges. In contrast, Jesus rails at hypocrites who view themselves as ‘better than’ others. Many evangelicals consider gays to be ‘lesser than’ — exactly opposite of Jesus’ amazing love. Being gay is not a disorder nor a sin — it is simply a different attraction.
I have mentored thousands of gay Christians. I have never met a single person whose same-sex attraction has permanently disappeared. Anyone who tells you differently is probably a charlatan. Oh yes, they may have decreased their homosexual behaviors; they may have stopped calling themselves ‘gay.’ But they have never ceased having a same-sex attraction.
You seem to believe that gays have a ‘lifestyle’ that is sordid and wicked. So do straights. I am gay and my lifestyle is to play with my grandkids, read the Bible, love others, and go to bed by 9pm. In contrast, many straight men hang out at bars, pickup anonymous women, have sex with them, and then discard them. It is their lifestyle that ought to offend you.
The Bible condemns straight men who abused their natural affections for women, and instead raped men of lesser status (e.g., slaves, pubescent boys). Such is not what gay Christians do.
Furthermore, the Bible never declares gay marriage to be wrong. Instead, Jesus speaks out against divorce. The divorce rate for straights is higher than that of gay marriages.
I know of thousands of [gay] men who apply a very Christlike model for relationships. They become attracted to a man. They date and get to know the man. They commit their lives to each other through marriage. And they live chaste lives of never being sexual with anyone other than their male spouse. I believe Jesus applauds such marriages — gay or straight.
[Jane], while you and I differ, we will nonetheless both be hugging each other in heaven. And Jesus will be hugging both you and me.
Many blessings to you,
Mike Rosebush
Dr. Mike Rosebush (Ph.D., Counseling Psychology; he, him, his;) is the creator and editor of GAYoda, plus a writer for Backyard Church. A short synopsis of Dr. Rosebush’s life can be found at I Lived the Most Unusual Gay Christian Life Ever. He may be contacted at mikerosebush75@gmail.com.
