The Chuck Norris of Programming —Jon Skeet

Photo by James Haworth on Unsplash

Before we begin, Let's see who is Jon Skeet

Jon Skeet is a senior software engineer currently at Google. He is a C# legend, won the Microsoft MVP award several times, and is also a Java developer, he actually writes Java at Google.

Jon Skeet became famous on StackOverflow. He is #1 on StackOverflow with the highest reputation yet.

Let's get into some facts about Jon Skeet.

1. Jon Skeet’s code doesn’t follow a coding convention. He is the coding convention.
2. Users don’t mark Jon Skeet’s answers as accepted. The universe accepts them out of a sense of truth and justice.
3. Jon Skeet can divide by Zero.
4. Jon Skeet’s Stack Overflow reputation is only as modest as it is because of integer overflow (SQL Server does not have a datatype large enough).
5. Jon Skeet coded his last project entirely in Microsoft Paint, just for the challenge.
6. When Jon Skeet’s code fails to compile, the compiler apologizes.
7. There are two types of programmers: good programmers, and those who are not Jon Skeet.
8. When Jon Skeet points to null, null quakes in fear.
9. Jon Skeet is The Traveling Salesman.
10. Drivers think twice before they dare interrupt Jon’s code.
11. Jon Skeet can stop an infinite loop just by thinking about it.
12. Jon Skeet doesn’t need a debugger, he just stares down the bug until the code confesses.
13. Jon Skeet does not resolve software problems. The problems resolve themselves the moment he walks into the office.
14. The Jon Skeet badge is awarded for posting a better answer than Jon Skeet. Only Jon Skeet can earn this badge.
15. Jon Skeet’s keyboard doesn’t have an F1 key, the computer asks for help from him.
16. When Jon Skeet presses Ctrl+Alt+Delete, a worldwide computer restart is initiated. The same goes for format.
17. God didn’t really create the world in six days, because Jon Skeet optimized it to one.
18. Jon Skeet dreams in ones and zeros. When two show up, it is a nightmare. But again that’s only in theory. Two doesn’t exist for Jon.
19. The database automatically gets normalized after seeing Jon nearby.
20. When Jon Skeet solves an equation, the variables become constants.
21. Jon Skeet has the key to Open Source. He just doesn’t want to close it.
22. When Jon Skeet is programming, the Garbage Collector rests. The objects know when to destroy themselves.
23. If the Internet is the web, then Jon Skeet is the spider.
24. When a null reference exception goes to sleep, it checks under the bed for Jon Skeet.
25. Jon Skeet doesn’t call a background worker, background workers call Jon Skeet.
26. When Jon Skeet throws an exception, nothing can catch it.
27. Jon Skeet doesn’t look for reputation. Reputation looks for Jon Skeet.
28. Jon Skeet can do pair programming with himself.
29. When Jon installed Visual Studio he opted not to install the debugger.
30. When Jon saves a file, the file thanks him.
31. Jon Skeet is immutable. If something’s going to change, it’s going to have to be the rest of the universe.
32. Jon Skeet doesn’t have performance bottlenecks. He just makes the universe wait its turn.
33. When John Skeet does a search on Google.. the only result is “I’ll be right back”.
34. When John Skeet presses F5, the Garbage collector collects itself. there is no other garbage.
35. Jon Skeet once wrote an entire operating system in his sleep on a Treo with no battery, powered only by the force of his will.
36. The only time Jon Skeet was wrong was when he thought he had made a mistake.
37. If you have 10000 reputation points and Jon Skeet has 10000 reputation points, Jon Skeet has more reputation than you.
38. Jon Skeet does not run his programs. He just whispers “you better run”. And it runs.
39. Jon Skeet was once second in rank, behind Jon Skeet.
40. Jon Skeet codes only with final sealed methods. No one has ever needed to override any of Jon Skeet’s code.
41. IDEs are afraid to autocomplete the code in front of Jon Skeet.
42. Private methods in other libraries become public automatically once required in Jon Skeet’s code.
43. Skeeted: The act of attempting to answer a Stack Overflow question only to find out that Jon Skeet has already answered it definitively and better than you would have ever done.
44. If Jon Skeet posts a duplicate question on StackOverflow, the original question will be closed as a duplicate.

Jon Skeet — https://stackoverflow.com/users/22656/jon-skeet

Reputation: 1,378,378

Reached: 376.6m

Answers: 35,536