Dude… But are you?
Society has revealed to us that males and females are supposed to stay far away from each other (that is in terms of clothing, colors, and cosmetics). From the very beginning, we’re divided into pink or blue. I’m pretty sure we can all recall someone’s baby shower or gender reveal in which a cupcake or decoration displayed whether IT would be a boy or girl. What we don’t think about is how this affects OUR boys growing up. Perplexed at the fact of whether they should wear light blue or black and opting for the latter in fear of being called a FAG (excuse my language) is pretty disturbing.
Not too long ago two best friends made the front page of many articles for deciding to go to Prom with one another. Not that big of a deal right? Here’s the catch… they’re both males (Gasp, I know). Well it turns out one friend is HELLA STRAIGHT, while the other is HELLA GAY. While this may seem like a step in the right direction. Why was is so highly publicized?
We often hear girls saying, “I’m going stag this year, just me and my girlfriends.” Seldom do you hear “I’m going Stag too, just me and my guy friends.”It’s not a big deal when girls do it, but it’s a big deal when guys do it (I hope you can see my point here). Why can’t guys go with each other without having to make it to the front page of a news article or guest starring on Ellen?
“Boys lay claim to masculine identities by lobbing homophobic epithets at one another.” — C.J Pascoe
A common image that comes to mind when you think about Middle/High School boys is the image of them taunting a boy who perhaps has too many GIRLfriends or likes to watch Disney movies, because then it’s like Dude…what are you doing? Don’t you like football and bro time? In C.J Pascoe’s Dude You’re A Fag, she goes into detail about how masculinity and the way its perceived influences a young person in terms of their sexuality and gender. Daily social interactions influence the type of person we later become and we allow ourselves to be affected by homophobic slur whether it be intentional or not we create an unsafe dialog for those who are not quote on quote this personified type of what it takes to be a man, because after all, what does it take to be a man? Who cares if you’re a “Man” and likes scented candles, maybe you just like your space to smell a little extra Cinnamon-y (no one’s judging here, I hope).