Man Up
If you hold a purse, you need to turn in your man card…Fruity cocktails are for women…Your girl picked matching shirts for you to wear? That’s gay. Stuff like this is said almost on a daily basis by young men who feel the need to prove their masculinity in an over the top way. They feel the need to be tough and any sign of weakness or femininity is automatically taboo. Dexter Thomas says in his article that when you challenge masculinity, it hits a nerve. There is this need to be a manly at all costs and anything otherwise is seen as inferior and should be ridiculed at all times. If it’s not, men have this fear that they will be seen as ‘gay’ and be less of a man. Like what Thomas mentions in the article that the hashtag had broadened to include a conversation on the hypersensitivity of many men, and how they police their own sexuality and perceived “manhood.” Why are men so scared if they a hint of femininity is affecting a small part of their lives? Women are encouraged to be a little tough, why can’t men be a little feminine?
Jaime Lutz wrote an article for Bustle where she defines what this phenomenon of men fearing being a little feminine is. She writes that it’s oppressive masculinity, a homophobic, sexist way that teaches boys to hate “girly” stuff, the way that attractive women are alternately worshipped and despised, and the way men are taught to be afraid of showing weakness. Oppressive Masculinity seems like it’s caught between fearing femininity and being called out for being sexist. It’s like when racist white people say they are not racist because they don’t want their image to be portrayed as being racist.
What is up with all these products marketed towards men? Does it really affect their masculinity if things like q-tips and food are seen as more manly?Are their egos really so fragile that they need to be reassure that they’re manly by using products that are marketed specifically towards them? By marketing things specifically, all it really is doing is becoming more sexist. Like the food mentioned in the picture above, all it is doing is gendering items that do not to be gendered. Food is neutral. What are they accomplishing if they market the food towards men? Do we really have to cater to fragile egos? It’s sad that men need reassurance in the simplest things to prove that they’re not ‘gay’. Thomas says in his article that products that pander to men’s insecurities may be a symptom of the fragility of the masculine ego. Rather than helping men become more confidant in themselves, products are pretty much telling them that this product is better because it won’t affect your masculinity. It’s like when children see a product with their favorite cartoon character on it, they only want the product because the packaging is appealing to them.
Why is there such a big fear for men to be feminine or sensitive? They have this tendency to police their manhood and call out anyone that is not following the ‘rules’. In an article by ABC7, it was talking about two women who were wanted for sexually assaulting a man. Watching the video, it was very obvious that the two women were trying to pick pocket the man in the video but it was the comments that were more interesting.
“Maybe women are not his thing…”
“Where is the crime? smh”
“What’s wrong with this dude! As an Aussie that video is my dream scenario for when I go to fill up my tank.There is no pick pocket, where she gonna discreetly put anything? At one point she bends down and picks up something for him. C’mon mate, it’s like Nicki Minaj rocked up at my local service station. Like R Kelly says; there’s nothing wrong with a little bump n grind!”
People were questioning his sexuality because he wasn’t into it and tried to push the women away. It’s another part of #masculinitysofragile because he wasn’t interested in what was considered a “dream scenario”. But if he was or if he was the one to do it to women, people would be more outraged instead of treating it like a joke or saying what was wrong with the victim. People need to take this issue of a fragile ego more seriously because the ones who are going to be more affected are those around them.
