The Darkness of Domestic Disputes
Today, we live in a world where it’s hard to escape from the scrutinizing eyes of the public, and the trailing cameras belonging to the media. With so much attention in open spaces, domestic disputes happening behind closed doors can easily be brought to the light when couples slip up public. Although romantic titles and public positions play a role in how these cases are handled, broadcasted, and magnified, a man and women who are in a relationship together function as creditor and debtor in many ways. As a male, men feel superior to women. This goes for both single and taken men.
It is rare that a man sees his woman as his equal. This hierarchy is partially rooted in the concept of men courting women. The idea of a man getting a woman’s hand in marriage instills a form of ownership of the woman. She is now his. She becomes subservient to him, while he is now entitled to her. In cases where there is a dominant figure, there must be a submissive figure as well. With this “push and pull” relationship structure, domestic disputes are very common. However, these disputes between couples oftentimes lead to abuse, thus resulting in actual cases of domestic violence against women.
Law and Order: Special Victims Unit, an American T.V. drama series based on police procedures, legal activities, and crime can be used an example. In season 16 eepisode 8 of the series, security camera footage captures a domestic dispute between a famous sportscaster and his girlfriend. The two are caught after a Black and White Gala getting rough with each other. Earlier that night, the sportscaster, A.J., had been flirting with a couple of fans in his girlfriend’s presence. Paula, who had been drinking that night, got jealous, proceeded to get loud with A.J., and embarrassed him in front of “important people”. The footage shows them in a stairwell getting physical. Paula is then seen stumbling and then A.J. punches her across the face. He knocks her out and then drags her out of the stairwell claiming that he had to “stop her”.
The creditor debtor relationship established between Paula and A.J. compares to Friedrich Nietzsche’s message in “On the Genealogy of Morality”. A.J.’s dignity was taken from him when his girlfriend embarrassed him. He felt emasculated and inferior. Because of that, he feels like he’s owed something in return. As Paula’s boyfriend, it is expected of him to already feel entitled to Paula. It’s also expected for him to feel entitled to a to a form of repayment for him feeling less than his counterparts. It can thought of as compensation for the inconvenience, similar to Nietzsche’s example of the monetary repayment from a debtor to a creditor. Repayment is instilled to be physical. In A.J.’s case, he punched his girlfriend, giving him a one-up for the loss of dignity.
There is a power dynamic established between creditors and debtors. The power dynamic however is physical since power is defined as ownership over one’s body. Thus, using the body as a form of repayment. As Nietzsche says, individuals act out of resentment, as did A.J. His wife’s behavior and actions were something he did not like. He felt bitter indignation from the unfair treatment he received. And as a creditor, he needed satisfaction. This satisfaction came from knocking out his girlfriend. However, there is a difference between a creditor who gets their own compensation, and it being given to them directly from the debtor. When creditors get their compensation themselves, the repayment isn’t always reasonable. They are ultimately granted the power to go to great extremes now that they are in control, and they take advantage of that. This ties in with Nietzsche’s belief that the human desire is to know that you can cause someone else to suffer, and that itself is satisfying.
Nietzsche then goes on by saying how punishment is made a spectacle. This is true in domestic violence cases especially when public figures are involved. The transparency allows public judgment to take place, helping instill a guilty conscious on the wrongdoer. Although domestic violence cannot be prevented, the consequences for the act can be made more extreme. By doing so, wrongdoers will ultimately fear the consequences of the act and be deterred from abusing their partners in the first place. This creates a system where the wrongdoers receive ultimate suffering for their actions. This way, the wrongdoer’s consequences are always of greater magnitude than the wrong they initially executed. Knowing that they have something worse in store for them takes power and control away from them. They will no longer feel satisfaction from revenge. It will cause them to look at things in a way similar to the notion of karma, what goes around comes around.
