I am an Impostor

“I can’t do it.”

“I won’t get this job; look at the applicants.”

“I am not good enough.”

Do these statements ring a bell? These are the statements of someone who society would call an impostor. An impostor based on popular definitions is a person who pretends to be someone else to deceive others, especially for fraudulent gain (sounds intense, but that’s as real as it can get, and that’s going to be the mood for this read, you’re welcome).

Often as creatives, white-collar employers and employees and everyday humans(by this, I mean people trying to survive), we come across situations that make us question our expertise in doing things. That has become almost second nature to us(p.s if you’re not there yet, it’s going to get to your turn, lol). A majority might argue that it stems from a place of fear, but I feel there’s more to it, and in this article, I’ll break down how you become or became an impostor.

“Let’s plant that impostor seed.”

For the sake of this illustration, we’re going to call the actor A, and A is a Nigerian(Super Eagle!).

So A is a straight-A student that has always been on top of his class irrespective of whatever tests the educational system has thrown at him (must be nice, go A!). He’s done with school and realises that getting a job would be hard considering the high unemployment rate, so he opts for a tech internship and gets in. As the tradition has always been, he came out at the top of his path in the internship, and the accolades came in. It felt really nice being admired by his peers and superiors because of the default sense of gratification and approval we possess as humans(the truth hurts). This gives A a lot of confidence, and he goes ahead to push boundaries.

“I think I’m a fraud.”

A has been making waves, and he’s been really doing good for himself. For his first few applications, he crafted the best CV you could imagine, highlighting his expertise and mastery in his field as precise and sturdy as the golden gate bridge. Then came the responsibilities of adulthood with all its expenses and stress. He realises he needs to earn more to survive, so he needs to apply for more jobs than he did apply, but he was in for a shocker. How could he not get the job? Two weeks later, he gets a series of rejection emails that get him caught between admiring the word prowess of the hiring manager and feeling absolutely disappointed at not getting the job. This kept on happening for a very long time, and it went ahead to affect the other things he did. He could barely be the straight-A student he always knew. He felt like a fraud.

Like A, we are constantly faced with these types of situations every day. The fact that you didn’t get that job doesn’t mean that you are not good enough. It’s the body trying to play it safe, which is not exactly ideal if you ask me.

If the Wright brothers never took a leap of faith with the first aeroplane, we wouldn’t be blessed with the gift of flight as humans. Would have the first telephone been created by Alexander Graham Bell if he settled for Moores first telegraph technology? I could go on and on about the “If’s and Would Haves’” of how our existence has been shaped, but it would only make this read lengthy.

The impostor syndrome comes with its pros and cons, the pro being that you’re self-aware of perceptions people have about you outside your immediate social group. The con being that self-awareness might lead to anxiety that sips into other aspects of your life if you let it.

To avoid the latter being the case, you need to remember you’re constantly adapting as a human, which is one of those scenarios. By adjusting, you take up more courses, work on that side project you’ve always wanted to, so there’s more to this impostor you’ve become. You could work on collaborative projects with a friend or someone who shares the same vision as you. Join a community of people in your area of interest; trust me, you won’t feel alone when you do.

These are all suggestions that might work or not, but the take-home from this is that It’s okay to be an impostor; this means you’re trying at something, and that’s a good thing.

I am an impostor.

It doesn’t hurt so much calling yourself that now, does it?