How I Lost Weight With My Girlfriend
I’d like to go on record saying that I was a full-fledged heap of garbage before I met my girlfriend. While I was far from the level of “war criminal” or “guy who’s never seen Arrested Development,” my attitude towards health, relationships, and style were something to be admired for how misguided they were. By far, it was my attitude towards food that was the most appalling, leaving me to wonder how I’m still alive and if my steady diet of fast food and microwavable meals left me with the insides of an elderly Chernobyl victim.
So, you could probably understand my enthusiasm skepticism (or perhaps it was skeptical enthusiasm) when my girlfriend encouraged me to change my eating habits. It was the little things that changed in the first year of the relationship; easing up on chips, cooking little meals for dinner, and not eating out 5+ times a week. I also stopped drinking beer every day, which significantly changed the way my pants fit. However, it wasn’t too long before the comforts of living together spread to the way we ate. We soon began eating too many homemade dinners followed by too many homemade desserts. Soon chicken with vegetables became chicken with vegetables followed by a heaping slice of cheesecake. This, combined with my inability to realize that whiskey was indeed as caloric as beer when consumed in massive amounts led to my weight gain.
It wasn’t a lot, maybe 15 pounds, but noticeable — especially when trying to wear button-up shirts and skinny jeans. My girlfriend, who just barely meets the 5’2” mark on a yardstick (or whatever you use to measure small people) gained enough weight where she noticed, prompting both of us to make a change. As a tried and true archivist, my girlfriend prides herself in her researching talent. Barely a day went by before she emailed me a link to a diet site. As far as diets go, this one is simultaneously low key. It’s far from the liquid “cleanses” that too many people subscribe to, but this “life-changing program” is one that cuts out an enormous amount of food… specifically comfort foods.
On this diet, you can’t consume added sugar, alcohol, grains, (including “wheat, rye, barley, oats, corn, rice, millet, bulgur, sorghum, amaranth, buckwheat, sprouted grains and all of those gluten-free pseudo-grains like quinoa”) legumes, dairy, MSG, or anything even resembling dessert. You can’t prepare “paleo pancakes” or anything vaguely similar and fun. You’re not allowed to step on the scale during the entire process and you have to start over if you “cheat” and break the diet. It is a very, very hard diet for those stuck in their ways; this is why my initial reaction to her was a resounding “NO.” She broke me, though, like all good partners do — she told me how we could benefit from this change and become healthier people. So, we did it.
Like most guys, any kind of diet has begun and ended with myself. I would start a diet because of how I looked and end it once I lost interest. When someone else is involved — a significant other or a coach — the accountability shifts to both parties. Suddenly, it’s not that easy to drop a diet — and that ended up being a good thing in my case.
Cooking with my girlfriend brought us closer together
For anyone within a thousand-yard radius of us, it’s clear we love each other. We’re affectionate, loving, and talk to each other like we’ve been together for 100 years. I didn’t think it was possible for us to become closer, but our diet made it happen. The puzzle-like intricacies of putting together an approved meal skyrocketed the level of communication we had on any given day. She would ask me what I wanted, I would tell her, and we’d make it happen. Sometimes she’d be my sous-chef, sometimes I’d chop vegetables for her; every minute we spent together in the kitchen felt like a date with the amount of interactions we shared.
We gave each other compliments
Since we weren’t allowed to weigh ourselves, we had to rely on our mutual attraction to each other to gauge the success of the program. I remember examining myself in the mirror and having her wrap her arms around me and proclaim that my beer gut had shrunk. Whenever she put on a new pair of pants, I’d practically salivate over her figure — which actually wasn’t too much of a huge change from before we started the diet. We kept each other’s spirits high and gave ourselves a reason to keep on pursuing the life-changing program.
We had each other’s backs
Because we’ve been together for so long (four years this May) we’ve managed to keep the exact same schedule — like, in a strangely similar way. We crave the same foods, accidentally surprise each with cartons of ice cream, and send each other similar recipes with shocking frequency. In case you’re wondering, yeah we dress alike. It’s an insufferable thing for everyone outside our little apartment. So, when one of us would groan from an unquenchable sugar craving, the other would offer a solution. There were so many times when I’d be beside myself with rage for choosing to do such a ridiculous diet, to which she’d suggest a walk around the park and a hot cup of coffee. Her cravings for cake would be met with my handing her a banana — an unfair substitution, but you get the point. We held ourselves accountable and, as a result, stuck to the diet.
The conversation still goes on
Since the diet has ended, we’ve gone on to incorporate aspects of the diet into our daily lives. We no longer eat food absolutely drenched in sauce and our ice cream addiction has mostly (kinda) gone away. We’re still always sending each other recipes for healthy meals and suggesting healthy alternatives for the comfort foods we so depended on. We have days here and there where we break the mould and absolutely ruin our stomachs with fried fast food, but for the most part, we’re doing it right.
