Resist the urge to flip the board
How to Develop a Winning Mindset Like a Chess Player
There are two sides of the coin and you need them both
When you picture chess players, you might imagine a bunch of nerds who can effortlessly remember a ton of moves, are ultra-logical and are laser-focused.
That’s part of it, for sure. But that’s just the stuff you’d find in a Forbes article. Let me tell you, there’s a whole other side to it. And guess what? You can effectively use that “other side” in your own life too.
Chess goes beyond being a mere game of victory. It is a field where one can refine their abilities to think and think about thinking.
It’s a journey of self-discovery, with both big wins and big losses. And so it starts with …
Lesson 1: Think probabilities, not binary
When you step into the game, the initial instinct is often, “I’ve got to win!” It’s ingrained in our survival DNA — conquer, achieve, succeed. But let’s switch gears. Imagine things are good, no lion is chasing us, food in the fridge, and our goal is simply to “develop.”
Now, the real question is, “Do you really need to win?”
Do you care about the outcome or the process?
In the realm of development, it’s not the outcome that matters most; it’s about establishing a consistent process that leads to better outcomes.
More good outcomes are better than one? Right? Ah, my math teacher would be proud.
Think of it this way: rather than aiming for a “1” every time (that’s your win), strive to increase the probability of reaching almost “1” 100 times, say, 78%. More good outcomes are better than just one, right? My math teacher would nod approvingly.
It’s like a probability game. Instead of fixating on winning, focus on developing your game to boost the likelihood of winning.
How can you do that?
- Enter the game with a learning mindset. Embrace your mistakes and resist the urge to flip the board if you lose. Normally, after every game, I would sit with my coach and go through each mistake I made and dig into each of them. It was deeply painful and emotional, but necessary.
- Play against stronger and tougher opponents than you, where the winning odds are low, but learning opportunities are high. When I was 7 I used to play chess against +50 y.o. men with a lifelong experience in chess.
This is more efficient and healthier for your game.
Why?
Firstly, you start paying attention to each move, thinking strategically instead of just attacking.
Secondly, you learn to adapt to different situations and different opponents. In the wild world, not everyone is like your peers, family, or even like you.
Yes, that makes you slow, but it is better to be slow now than later.
A horse view is great in the short term, but in the long term, the horse gets tired.
Lesson 2: Winners are not afraid of losing
When you’re in it for the long haul, opting for a series of 100 games rather than a single one, you’re implicitly increasing both your chances of winning and losing.
Building on Lesson 1 of thinking in probabilities, here’s another nugget: “Think probabilities, not binary, and make sure you decrease the probability of reacting heavily to a loss.”
Let me explain.
In theory, you can win (1), lose (0), or draw (0.5). In practice, emotions come into play depending on the result. Winning might bring pride, confidence, and relief while losing could evoke anger, disappointment, and sadness. The same applies to a draw.
Now, let’s focus on the losing part. Losses tend to hit harder, and they’re not isolated incidents. Three consecutive losses sting more than three losses scattered across nine games. Mathematically, it may not make a difference, but humans don’t feel mathematically.
But why is that? I’m no psychologist, and I’m not an expert on human behaviour, so I can’t give you a factual answer.
What I do know is that losing stays with us.
We do not only lose, we feel like losers. And that is the feeling you want to reduce. No, not eliminate. REDUCE.
The more you lose, the more you will decrease the time to reactivity and your mind will build a routine of losing.
Back in the day, a few lost games would occupy my thoughts for a week or more. It took me about 10 years to cut that down to a couple of hours. Yeah, not everyone’s a quick learner.
Reducing this mental hangover helped me focus on the next game without dragging the “loss baggage” into it. Let’s face it; it doesn’t help during a game to berate yourself for a mistake at move 35 when you should be thinking about move 15 in the line you need to make right now.
Long story short, it’s not just about losing; it’s about how you react to losing that counts. A winning mindset involves accepting losses but getting back fast in the game.
How can you do that?
- Next time you don’t land the job you wanted, or your favourite pizza is not on the menu anymore, go into the corner, cry, have some ice cream, and the next day, come back to the game with a clean slate.
- Allow yourself to lose. Life offers you not one game, but lots of them every day. Remind yourself of that. And there is no limit. Well, unless you die. But let’s not think about that.
- Do what you are afraid of multiple times. If heights scare you, try rock climbing. If water gives you the jitters, go for a swim. The list goes on.
