If Time Allowed Us

Found on Google Images

What an eerie hunt
Going after you, time through

Time goes and I’m looking.
You’re not here, not geographically

Not physically

Not at all.

Yet I cringe everytime 
As if you were staring at me

With that blasé glance 
With that condescending nod.

What a villainess you are!
I am!
Aren’t we too fond of this?

The scratching burns
Where you’d pierce your nails
Laughing as you chant words

As you vow to remain 
Anchored

I’m at your feet, at the gold dust
of your hair.

No. You’re not here.

My vision shakes
Time aches 
It only goes foward

We never reach the same point
History’s invariable
I missed the race

The rampant chance 
Of belonging to the same place
At the very same space

And then there’s the truth
The annihilating truth
That makes one sick

That makes this all just delusional.

You’re over my shoulder
Cigarette smokes rolling into my hair
I love and I hate your breath

Your perfume gets stained everywhere.

But we’d entertain one another
Every time boredom got to us

Whenever we’re too tired to judge
To criticize all over

And back again.

I dare say we’d be friends.

I would not let you get away.

Not this time.

Not again.

There’d be notes on receipts 
You brought from the market

Only to be seen two weeks later

No apologies. 
I wouldn’t even expect it.

But a smile.
Perhaps before you take a shower
As you convey your emotions to the mirror

And you’d know that

Finally

Someone’s willing to give it back.

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