If It Was “Emily in Belgrade”
I’ve seen the Netflix series “Emily in Paris” described as something like the American fantasy abroad. And, as an American living abroad, I would agree: It is very, very fantastical.
Naturally, it’s a show I love to hate. In fact, many people on the internet love to hate this show. Some are annoyed by the way Paris and Parisians are portrayed; others are annoyed by the lack of cast diversity. Many of us are simply annoyed by how unrealistic the whole thing is. That’s what makes it such a guilty pleasure.
But, I also found myself relating to it on some level. Not the part about fashion or an actual following on social media (lol, as if). I mean some of the smaller bits thrown in about culture shock and the language barrier. Like how there’s no elevator in Emily’s apartment building, and how she can’t even order a pastry in French without fucking it up (un pain au chocolat, pas une).
Only, here in Serbia, plenty of old buildings have elevators. Sure, they’re terrifying, communist-era cages that go up and down and give you the worst emotional rollercoaster of your life — but, still, they’re there.
And, personally, I have no problem naming pastries in Serbian. What I do have a problem with is accidentally ordering 100 kilograms of them instead of grams.
Anyway, these little comparisons got me thinking: What if the show had been about Emily in Belgrade?
I for one would enjoy it much more. Western Europe has been rehashed to death. We’ve all seen like 10,000 movies and read 10,000 books about England and France and WWII. We get it: Nazis bad, everyone else good.
“Emily in Belgrade” would offer American viewers a glimpse of something new. It would be set in a place that’s overlooked, yet up-and-coming. In fact, Belgrade has been nicknamed “the next Berlin” by people who couldn’t come up with a more original way to market the nightlife here.
More importantly, it would cast a contemporary light on this corner of the world, and hopefully a more positive one. We need that, because Americans don’t know much about Eastern Europe aside from “Communism, yikes!” and “Is there like, a war there?”
… And yet, I’m skeptical. Chances are the show would have completely misrepresented life in Serbia. In fact, there’s a very brief scene in Season 1 where we see a model who tells Emily she’s from Serbia — a cold, tall, blond woman who says about one sentence and then walks off naked. And in Season 2 Emily meets Petra, a character from Ukraine who’s portrayed so shamelessly that it elicited a formal complaint from Ukraine’s Minister of Culture and Information Policy.
So yeah, I’m like 90% sure I’d be here writing a rant about shit like that instead of this. But maybe, just maybe, it would have been refreshing — and a lot more meaningful.
Too bad way fewer people would watch a show called “Emily in Belgrade.” So here I am, left to rewrite the series for my own entertainment…
Emily Would Be Here By Accident
You may be wondering, “How would Emily find herself in Serbia of all places?” Even she would be wondering that. It’s not likely Emily would have serious plans to move here; in fact, she might not intend to come at all.
Like some tourists, she’d be backpacking or train-hopping through Europe before stumbling upon this “hidden gem.” Though, given her personality, I think she’d be the type who came to Novi Sad for the EXIT music festival and simply never left. She’d make friends and have a summer fling hot and heavy enough to make her stay — but then she’d break up by the time she really settled in.
She Would Work in Tech
In the original series, Emily finds herself working in France’s luxury sector, but I don’t picture her doing the same here in Belgrade. Don’t get me wrong, this city has its own fashion scene; but, seeing as the series is chock-full of clichés, I’d have to put Emily in a more typical scenario. That means she’d be working in Serbia’s booming tech industry.
True to the original series, I’d keep her role in social media marketing. That’s realistic enough based on my personal experience.
Before landing that job, however, it’s likely she’d make ends meet by teaching English online to kids in China. That’s what most young Americans do when they turn up here and realize they have no marketable skills. (Yes, that is shade I’m throwing!)
The Language Barrier Wouldn’t Hold Her Back
In the beginning, Emily would suck at Serbian. Not only is the grammar a bitch, but the language has two alphabets. She’d butcher the pronunciation even more than she butchers French. But, everyone here would be flattered by her effort and easily impressed. They would teach her new words and rarely ever point out her mistakes.
Besides, Emily wouldn’t really need to speak Serbian to get around. Many people in the city speak English and are happy to. The company where she works may even hold their meetings in English, as is the case with some startups and outsourced operations here.
She Would Make Way More Friends
In the original series, Emily has a hard time making friends at first. This is due to the stereotype that French people are rude, at least to Americans. In Serbia, however, Emily would receive a warm welcome.
In fact, her friend Camille in the original series reminds me a lot of my own friends here in Serbia: helpful, outgoing, encouraging. Anyone Serbian reading this would find that laughable because they have a self-deprecating attitude about their own people. That’s part of their charm at first, but Emily would eventually find it irritating.
She would also get tired of the same interrogation from everyone she meets — and I mean everyone, including her gynecologist: Why are you here? How do you like our country? You have Serbian boy? Are you hungry? Come, eat, eat.
She would be invited to coffee constantly — it’s like their main activity here, aside from eating. And, speaking of eating, she’d probably get invited to one or two slavas, which is a feast in honor of every family’s patron saint.
But Her Friends Would Be a Bit Different
As in Paris, Emily would find another foreigner here to show her the ropes. Although, that friend probably wouldn’t be a nanny like Mindy in the original. Those aren’t exactly common in Serbia.
When it comes to Emily’s Serbian friends, the biggest difference is that no one’s family would have a champagne legacy. They might have a winery, though, in which case I’d make sure Emily had the chance to try Bermet — a type of dessert wine unique to Northern Serbia that was once so revered they stocked bottles of it on the Titanic.
As for cast diversity, well, viewers would still be disappointed. Compared to major cities in the States and Western Europe, Emily would find Belgrade overwhelmingly white. Of course not everyone here is, and it would be ideal to represent that reality. This community is also diverse in many other ways, including faith, ethnicity, and customs.
But remember, this show is just a bunch of clichés slapped together scene by scene, so if Emily’s living in one of Belgrade’s gentrified neighborhoods like most expats and working with stereotypical locals, then she’s just not running with a very diverse crowd. The most likely exception to this would be her foreign friend, Mindy.
Depending on who else she meets, Emily might be introduced to the city’s queer-friendly side. Perhaps she’d have a colleague like Julien, but he probably wouldn’t be openly gay in the workplace. Although, then again, some tech companies and foreign offices here have a more liberal atmosphere which could prove me wrong.
One thing true to the original series: Many of Emily’s friends and colleagues would still be chain smokers.
Emily’s Not In Belgrade… But You Could Be
Netflix probably won’t be sending a film crew over here any time soon (for the best, I reckon), but that shouldn’t stop you from coming someday. There’s a whole world out here far more colorful and nuanced than the one you’ve binged in your bed.
But, I get it: Most Americans just want more of the same. That’s why we’ve all watched 10,000 movies about Western Europe already. We need something familiar to draw us in, and Belgrade has no pre-existing place in our European fantasy. I mean, why do you think I had to write about “Emily in Paris” just so you would read this?
