A Delicate Balance

Giving students a voice while keeping mine quiet

At 10:00 on Wednesday, March 14th, students across the country will leave their desks, their classrooms, their schools. They will walkout for seventeen minutes. Seventeen, exactly. One for each victim of the Parkland school shooting. These students are following the lead of the outspoken teens from a community victimized by gun violence. They are hoping to unify in the wake of tragedy. Although nothing can erase the unspeakable atrocities committed, one thing is for sure, these kids will not be silenced until action is taken.

As a person, I am inspired. But as a teacher, I am torn.

As a teacher, I must remain neutral. I cannot support this walkout. I cannot condemn people who speak against it. I cannot infringe upon any student’s First Amendment rights. But as a human, I simply cannot ignore it.

So what is an educator to do? For starters, I will turn to my students. I think of one girl, in particular. Adriana. Adriana has taken on the responsibility of organizing her peers, meeting with administration, involving law enforcement, and ensuring the safety of her fellow classmates. She has promoted the walkout using social media and social accountability. She, like Parkland student Emma Gonzalez, will raise her voice to hold lawmakers accountable for listening to her generation. She will not be ignored. She will not be silenced.

I have to admit, the weeks since February 14th have been trying. I am constantly reminded of the responsibilities of my position — and I’m not referring to the everyday stressors of an educator, but to the life and death matters not included in my job description. I am morally responsible but for ensuring students’ safety and, need be, protecting their lives. That realization hasn’t been easy. But in times when I feel like this job has become too hard, too risky, too violent, I remember students like Emma and Adriana. Those students who will leave my classroom on Wednesday because they cannot sit and wait for another mass shooting. They cannot watch more Snapchat footage of lifeless bodies or read the Twitter feeds of traumatized students.

This protest on Wednesday isn’t about me. It’s not about what I think or how I feel. It’s about them. I will sit in silence and secretly support my students. Although I may not be able to speak my mind, I will let them do the taking. And never will I feel more proud.