OMG, YOU GUYS — Our Latest Market Research Indicates Millennials Respond Well to More Colloquially Written Headlines

Dude, there were big waves made in the market research world today that totally blew our minds that we totally gotta tell you all about. It turns out that readers between the ages of 18 and 29 — a highly valuable demographic that Internet content creators like us are desperate to reach — respond better to headlines and articles written in a more informal tone than they do to traditional newspaper headline formats.

“Whhaaaaa?!?” we said to ourselves.

Seriously, we wish you guys could’ve been there. One guy was like “Forreal?!?” And then someone else was like “Forreal.” LOL!

Like, let’s be real here. You guys deserve to have your content delivered EXACTLY the way you want! So therefore everyone should bend over backwards to satisfy that preference because as capitalists, we’re held economically hostage by the dominant consumer group! LOL!

So keep those opinions coming, folks! Unless of course you’re old, in which case TOO BAD!

LOL!