Living amongst 74 million Trump supporters

November 11, 2020

On Saturday after the election was called, I spotted a conservative former co-worker who I was friendly with and who I respected post a mean-spirited joke about Biden having dementia (he doesn’t) when her political posts are usually pretty tame.

As someone who had two grandparents suffer through real, painful dementia and a good friend with a bad stutter and who has watched conservatives (led by Trump) call Biden senile because of his stutter or other regular verbal slip-ups this whole campaign, it made me angry.

I reacted with a joke about Trump and an expression of disappointment. It turned into a full-on flame war and even when I tried to turn down the temperature and explain to her why I took offense, she reacted like Trump would — doubled down, claimed it was a harmless joke when in reality it’s not funny and toxic, and wildly tried to change the subject.

I don’t think it’s possible to live in a country where 330 million people agree politically, and I don’t want to make political beliefs a pre-requisite for friendship. But I also think it’s fair to call out family and friends when they say wild shit.

I defriended her and while I think it’s tough to balance at what point you cut off family and friends because of their political beliefs, I also think we need to continue to call out people who make the political climate toxic.