Why Your Habits Never Stick
No wonder change feels impossible.
If you’ve ever tried to build a habit and failed, you probably blamed yourself — too lazy, undisciplined, unmotivated.
Truth is, it’s not you. It’s biology.
We humans are notoriously bad at change.
And that’s largely because our brains are stuck in caveman mode, prioritizing instant rewards over long-term goals.
Back in the day, survival meant finding food, avoiding predators, and reproducing — not planning for retirement.
Our ancestors didn’t live long enough to worry about the future, so their brains didn’t evolve for it.
Fast-forward to today, and here we are, surrounded by temptations like binge-worthy shows and late-night snacks, trying to fight biology.
No wonder change feels impossible.
But behavioral scientist Katy Milkman has good news: instead of fighting your biology, you can work with it.
Milkman’s research on present bias — our tendency to prioritize immediate gratification — offers a clever workaround called temptation bundling.
The idea is to pair something you should do with something you want to do.
For example, listen to your favorite podcast (ahem) while cleaning, or save your favorite coffee for work hours.
Milkman herself only allowed herself to listen to Harry Potter audiobooks while hitting the treadmill, and suddenly, the gym felt more like Hogwarts.
This principle works because making habits fun keeps you consistent.
And there’s a plot twist to consistency: Milkman found that rigid routines can actually backfire.
A study at Google revealed that employees with flexible workout schedules stuck to their habits better than those with rigid plans.
Why? Because life happens.
Flat tires, sleepless nights, or endless meetings can derail even the most dedicated plans.
Flexible habits adapt; rigid ones don’t.
So, how do you use this? Aim for “frequent and flexible.”
Set an ideal time for your habit, but have a backup plan — and a backup for the backup.
Miss your morning meditation? Try after dinner.
Couldn’t make the gym? Go for a quick walk instead.
The goal is progress, not perfection.
Lastly, don’t wing it.
We often jump into new habits with enthusiasm but zero strategy.
Instead, identify your biggest obstacles. Do you hate the task? Forget about it? Get overwhelmed?
Once you know what’s tripping you up, you can tailor solutions to overcome those barriers.
Building habits isn’t about “never failing” — it’s about learning, adjusting, and starting again.
Ask yourself: What’s gotten in my way before? Why did I fail? What can I do differently this time?
Thank you for reading!
