Writing Advice
Your Writer’s Block Might Actually Be This
Writer’s block truth bomb comin’ at ya…
In some of the best writing years of my life I was surrounded by other writers — I was part of an active writers’ group, I was all-in on the social aspect of that dynamic, and I was motivated by the eager and excited energy of those around me. Writer’s block was a romanticized phenomenon; a cross we were all too willing to bear; it was to be worn like a well-earned patch on our sleeves.
Were those my most productive writing years? Not by a long shot. But, they were enjoyable. I got to talk about writing a lot. I got to be around people who understood me. They got it in a way not a lot of others in my life did.
But I didn’t produce the way I should have for how enjoyable the talking about writing was. I finished almost nothing. I chalked a lot of my not producing up to writer’s block.
Nowadays I’m hard-pressed to find other writers to talk to IRL. And the idea of going out to meet up with other writers is laughable because, well, I’m an introvert. Also, I have a household to help run with my husband. Kids to play with and feed. Chores to do, etc.
And also because I’m actually writing when I write. I don’t want to talk about it. I want to get my words written, and then I want to get feedback, and rewrite, and get better, and revise, etc., etc., etc.
And, now, when I do talk to writers, it’s generally about productivity: How many words, how many pages, how many minutes? Any new ideas? Motivated? Writer’s block?
Me: “I did 40 thousand words in April, 20 thousand in May, and plan on doing another 20 thousand in June. You?”
Them: “I haven’t written in X days.”
Them: “I can’t find the [energy, time, motivation, space] to [write, edit, revise, journal].”
Them: “I wish I could find the time like you do.”
Them: “I think maybe I’m just not cut out for this.”
These are the things I hear.
I can’t relate to that. Not anymore. Not-so-humble brag:
I don’t really experience writer’s block.
And it’s not because I don’t also have a full life and day-to-day demands that could — and do — make it very difficult to write, revise, finish manuscripts, read, and query for agents (see above re: kids, chores, etc.)
For a long time, I fell into a trap of finding energy, time, and motivation for the things I love (like writing). I’d look to others to find solutions for my own follow-through issues, like there was some magic potion that could cure my writer’s block and make me write. Comparison is the thief of joy, and all that, so I would generally just fall deeper into a creative funk.
The Thing About Finishers…
But, then, something changed. A switch got flipped in my brain. I didn’t have an explanation for this for a long time. But I think I finally figured out what sets finishers apart.
I don’t find energy, time, and motivation. I found my values, and then I made promises to myself and I kept them. And I keep doing that over and over and over.
Writing is one of my core values, and I live that value. Writing is a non-negotiable.
I write more than I don’t. There are days that I can’t, of course — nothing derails a writing routine like puking children, okay? But, principally, I make time to write 70–80% of my days.
I do the prep work to set myself up for success during those writing sessions. That means putting in work so that I can do the work. Setting my alarm, outlining, dedicating space, setting intention. I can’t expect anything to be handed to me. There is no magic potion.
80/20 or 70/30
I follow a wellness/weight loss account on Instagram. It’s a ridiculous account that uses comedy and hard truths to get people onboard with living a healthier lifestyle. I, myself, have used this creator’s advice to lose 20+ pounds. I have never been so successful with losing weight in my life.
Again, for a long time I wasn’t sure what had changed for me. But then I realized something. One of the key tenants of the weight loss program he teaches is this:
Consistency is key.
You must incorporate the behaviors into your values, then live those values over and over and over.
Maintain a sense of integrity to yourself and to the tenants of the program, and you will see results.
If you don’t eat healthy and move your body, you aren’t going to see results. And if you think a crash diet or some quick fix is going to set you up for success for the rest of your life, you’re delusional (his words).
It’s about habits.
It’s about consistency; doing the same things over and over.
It’s about making promises to yourself and then keeping them.
It’s an integrity thing.
Your Writer’s Block Might Actually Be An Integrity Issue
If you don’t write, you can’t be a writer. If you want to be a writer, you must write. If you don’t write, it may not be because you have writer’s block. It might be because you’re not living the value of writing and creating consistently.
Consistent = 70–80% of the time. Shit happens, of course. Most people (you are very likely not the exception to this rule…) can’t hit perfection. That’s okay. 20–30% of the time skipping your routine isn’t going to derail you forever, unless you let it.
Don’t let it. Keep your promises to yourself.
Having one bad nutrition day doesn’t mean you should quit eating healthy.
Missing one day of reading doesn’t make you illiterate.
Not brushing your teeth one morning won’t make your teeth fall out.
But if you let one day turn into three, then ten, then 45, well… You’re just a quitter. It doesn’t mean you have writer’s block.
You see where I’m going with this?
The integrity piece is an uncomfortable truth. Lots of people say they are writers, say they are writing a book, say they are putting in work when they actually aren’t. That’s not integrity. That’s wishing upon a star — which is also okay. Every time I catch 11:11, I wish I would find a literary agent.
But I’m also putting in the work, and keeping my promises to myself.
Are you keeping your promises to yourself? Or are you wishing on a star and hoping the results will come without putting in the work?
Keep yourself accountable. Have some integrity — for yourself, mostly.
Keep your promises to yourself. You deserve it.
