I’m Starving & The Bar Has Only A Frozen Burger & A Tainted Tuna Sandwich. I Can’t Choose
What Does Someone Desperately Hungry Do If The Only Two Menu Choices Are (1) Not Good & (2) Super Bad?
By David Grace (Amazon Page — David Grace Website)
You went hiking alone two days ago, got lost, and your cell phone died. You’ve been drinking water from some small creeks just to survive. All you’ve had to eat is one small cookie the morning you began your hike.
It’s sunset on the third day and when you push through a break in the trees you stumble onto a deserted two-lane. Across the road is a ramshackle bar, The Fall Inn.
You stagger across the asphalt and enter the gloomy room. There’s an old guy in a stained t-shirt standing behind the bar. Behind him is a flickering Budweiser sign.
“Do you have any food?” you ask in a desperate voice. He’s silent for several seconds then says, “Well, we don’t get much call for meals here. Let me look.”
A minute later he shows up with a tuna sandwich inside a crumpled, foggy cellophane package and a half-empty plastic bag labeled “Frozen Hamburger Patties.”
“I could nuke one of these here frozen burgers if you want. I’ve got half a bag of Wonder Bread in the fridge.” Then he fishes a couple of ketchup packets from beneath the bar. Five bucks,” he says. You look uncertain. “I’ll throw in a cup of diet coke if you like.”
“How old is the sandwich?”
He squints at the faded label. “Three months. It might still be good, maybe. Five bucks.”
You have six dollars in your jeans.
You’re starving. You can’t delay eating until you can get someone to come all the way out here and drive you back to civilization.
So, your choice is the thawed-out, microwaved burger on a couple of slices of Wonder Bread with some ketchup or the tuna sandwich that’s got at least a 50–50 chance of giving you food poisoning.
What do you do?
It’s a pretty simple choice, right? You give him the five bucks, slather the warmed up burger with two packets of ketchup, shake on a goodly amount of salt and chow down.
But, no. You know the burger will taste like dry, chewy cardboard and the tuna sandwich will likely put you into the emergency room, praying for a stomach pump. You just can’t decide.
That’s the kind of person you are. If you don’t see exactly what you want on the menu you just tell the waiter, “I’ll have what he’s having.” If you’re faced with a decision where there is no choice that you like, you freeze up and let someone else choose for you.
So, you reluctantly close your eyes and tell the old guy behind the bar, “I don’t like either one. I abstain. You make the choice for me.”
So, let me ask you straight out–How stupid would you have to be to do that?
Really, really dumb, right? Well, maybe not intellectually dumb, but dumb in the practical sense, zero common sense, foolish enough to continue to stand out in the rain because there wasn’t a big fluffy rug inside that you could wipe your wet feet on.
So, applying this situation to the real world today, here’s the deal:
No matter what you do, it’s 100% certain that either Harris (the dried-out, nuked hamburger patty on Wonder Bread) or Trump (the mold infected tuna sandwich) is going to be elected President.
So, do you frown, grit your teeth, and tell the old guy behind the bar to make you the Harris burger or do you abstain, tell him to make the choice for you, and take the chance that he will take your five-dollar bill and give you the Trump salmonella-laden tuna sandwich followed by a trip to the emergency room?
Wake up! If Dick Cheney can bring himself to close his eyes and grit his teeth and vote for Harris, then by God you can too.
I don’t want to listen any more to anybody who says, “Trump is totally unacceptable, but gee I’m not sure about Harris so I’ll just abstain and let other people pick the next President for me.”
If that’s you, then you should go look at yourself in the mirror and ask yourself, “What the hell is wrong with me?”
— David Grace (Amazon Page — David Grace Website)
