I remember my mother telling me stories
of those who rose above
saw themselves as eagles and left the flock of crows
unburied themselves from life’s burdens
telling me to be great you must study the great
walk and talk as they did
Surround yourself with those who do what you want to do
History tells you how
You need just the patience to listen
To take yourself above the oak and among the clouds

I remember father telling me myth
of Thor and Goliath
That I do more that is seen and am more than I think
That I can go blow for blow with death
Remember that I am a king.

Taking me on adventure to the place few desire to go
Doing the things few desire to do
Seeing him admire those who have what many want
To rise above the trees and stand amongst the peaks
Possessing the arrogance to say I belong
I belong above the oak and among the clouds.

My brother taught me how to think
To follow the trail back into myself
And see what story brought me here.
To learn how you are and realize your past is not stone
To cross out what was there.
Pick up where it left off and continue
To forgive yourself when you must
To continue walking
To continue living
Until you are above the oak and among the clouds.

I tell myself stories
myth of things far from present.
subtle disillusionment
filled with bits of history and legend and self
My chest held tall with a lion’s pride
That I belong above the oak and among the clouds.

I believe who we are, is the conglomerate of the stories that we are told, and those that we tell ourselves. Reflecting on my upbringing I realize that I have kinds of stories that create the stories that I tell myself now.

My mother emphasized that importance of reading biographies growing up. She saw that I had an interest in it and encouraged it. All of them were people who had some sort of set back and rose above, like how eagles rise above crows, as she would say. [ but I feel like that’s a prerequisite to getting a biography].

My father, on the other hand, gave me mythologies and took me to the Sierras [above the oak, and among the clouds] and showed me that I could do more than I thought. The one story I remember the most was a Story of Thor.

Thor was presented to the Gods in the Halls of Asgard. He was told that he had to complete challenges and he would be accepted by the Gods, as he was only a demigod. The First Challenge. He was shown a massive dining table, miles long end to end, and told to lift it. He positions himself and starts lifting. He lifts as hard as he can and only manages to lift one of the legs up just a few inches. Thor looks around and sees the gods smirking and whispering to each other.
The Second Challenge: He was presented a chalice full of water and told he was told to drink it all. So Thor lifts it to his mouth and begins to drink, and drink. After drinking as much as he can, he sets it down and notices that he has barely lowered the water level. Again he looks around and sees the gods smirk and whisper to each other.
The Third Challenge: Begining to feel discouraged Thor enters an arena and is told his last challenge will be a fight. His opponent walks out and Thor sees an old woman. They begin to battle and it goes on for days, eventually, it is called a draw. Again Thor sees the smirks and the gods whispering to each other.
Thor runs away feeling discouraged before the gods can tell him anything.
What they would have told him is how impossible all the things he did are. The table represented the surface of the earth and he had lifted a continent. The chalice of water represented the seven seas and he had lowered the oceans. The old woman was Death, and he had gone blow for blow. The gods were not only impressed but fearful of Thor’s power.
Moral of the Story: You are doing more and are doing better than you think you are. You do the impossible and think that you failed without knowing why it was impossible.

My father told me this story after I was considering quitting wrestling my senior year of high school. I had been in the sport since 8 years old and thought I was meant to be and all time great because of it. I thought I had failed as a wrestler and somehow as a person. This story got me through that season and through every semester that makes me feel like I am behind a standard that isn’t there.

Last is my brother, who told me that I have power in myself. What I think is pain, is a setback, is in truth power. That if I can reclaim things that I see as fault then I can find peace. He taught me how to look into myself and find out what made me this way and what stories are inside of me.

But when I say “story tell yourself” I do not mean to fall into delusion. It's about being self-aware and giving yourself the confidence to create who you want to be. Find out what stories created you, the good and bad. Reclaim them and love yourself.