Gratitude #67: Sliding Doors
I can guarantee when my friends read this title they’ll assume I’m talking about the Gwyneth Paltrow-and-some-guy movie because like most hipsters I’ve only got one move: “remember the 90s?”. Even Marge Simpson has 2 moves: shake and bake.
And my friends would usually be right, I often mention 90s pop culture references because all it requires to get a chuckle is an okay memory of a misspent youth as opposed to coming up with something actually clever or smart. But I’ve recently found myself harbouring a deep admiration for actual sliding doors, for the sake of simplicity let’s assume they’re electric.
Firstly, I straight up respect the dizzying array of sliding door types out there — left to right, right to left, the 2 door middle out — just dizzying.
Secondly, I like the no-handle angle they’re running with. It’s a fresh take and one I’m sure has a future.
Thirdly, when they don’t work as expected they can be hilarious. We’ve all seen people not recognised by electric doors’ cheap motion sensors — possibly because they have no soul — and if you’re lucky they’ll walk straight into the door **insert human-techno-complacency allegory here**.
But if you’re really lucky you’ll get to see someone dealing with a slower-than-expected sliding door. Seeing someone caught by a slow door is rare and still fresh. Jo walks into 7 Eleven at a regular pace, confident of the ruthless efficiency of the almighty 7 Eleven Inc, only to see the door limp achingly across the frame. So now she hovers impatiently with her nose to the door like a kid on Christmas morning peering into the living room.
If you’re really really lucky you’ll see Jo rush through the door before its fully closed and proceed to hit her heavy handbag on the door. It’s just a nice, humbling moment of zen that forces us to take stock. Or not ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
