Bad Conversation Starters for Other Parents at a Kid’s Birthday Party

Want to make friends? Don’t say these things.

Anything that follows, “When I looked up your house on Zillow…”

Are you also thinking about moving to higher ground further inland because of climate change?

Anything that follows, “I was reading about screen time and children’s brain development…”

Are you on the local university alert system to hear about the shootings in real time?

Anything that follows, “I was looking at the National Sex Offender Registry and…”

Have you seen what our kids are posting on social media? I guess now we know what Peter’s mom smokes.

Anything that follows, “I hear you. My therapist thinks you should…”

How do you answer your kid’s questions about your sex toys?

Anything that follows, “Wasn’t democracy fun?”

Can I have your number? You know, just in my kid’s labs come back positive.