Humor
I Have a Superpower, and It’s Called “Wearing Combat Boots”
Like any superhero, the power is all in what you wear!
My black Timberlands are here to let you know that I’m not a civilian. I’m a BADASS who chews up every obstacle and spits it back up! From the moment I saw this elite footwear in Payless Shoes, I knew I was walking out wearing something that said, “Not only am I different, I’m PREPARED! Much more prepared than those simpletons who buy Converse and Penny Loafers!”
My morning jogs aren’t just exercises anymore, they’re a furious charge into the life threatening danger lurking around every corner! My household chores aren’t just cleaning, they’re a battle of attrition, where only the strong survive! And every email I send isn’t just business, it’s a vital mission, executed with speed and accuracy!
Don’t think you have to wear combat boots to answer emails? THINK AGAIN! These bad boys have to be laced up, zipped up, AND buckled before going anywhere, so you KNOW they mean business! Hell, they put the “BUSINESS” in “Business Attire” and no matter how much my boss says they are “unprofessional and at odds with the environment of a Fortune 500 company”, I will NEVER stop wearing them to the office!
