Humor
Snack Leader Guide for “Fun with the Plagues” Vacation Bible School
You won’t believe what you’ll be serving!
Greetings Vacation Bible School Snack Leader!
We here at Lordy Lou Church Publishing are SO excited to have you and your crew on board for our “Fun with the Plagues!” Vacation Bible School (VBS) this summer. Inspired by the great success of last year’s “Crucifixion Capers,” we have created another full week of fabulous, Bible-based activities for little campers ages 4–8!
SNACK LEADER GUIDE
Here’s the lineup, along with acceptable substitutes if you are too lazy to bother. However we do encourage you to serve the featured snacks, as they are relatively simple to prepare and add a real “WOW” factor to your VBS. While at first glance these recipes may seem a bit extreme, rest assured we have done our due diligence, and they are all Biblically sound. John the Baptist, for example, was a huge fan of locusts. And remember, a little suffering is an integral part of the “faith experience”; we believe you’re never too young to learn THAT!
MONDAY: French Fried Locusts
For this extra-special crunchy treat, simply gather live locusts (or grasshoppers if it’s not a year for locusts in your area), three or four per child. Dip them, first in beaten egg, then in flour. Fry in a kettle of hot oil (360 degrees) just until the insects stop moving around. Serve with ketchup and wait for the smiles!!
SUBSTITUTE: Cheerios
TUESDAY: Bloody Good Soup
A little advance prep needed for this one, as the children will each have a vial of their own blood drawn (most churches have a nurse or two as members; they’ll love getting involved!) Mix extracted blood with water, salt and pepper, and serve piping hot with some goldfish crackers floating on top (a fun reminder that the bloody sea killed all the creatures in it!)
SUBSTITUTE: Cups of ketchup, also served with floating goldfish crackers
WEDNESDAY: “Fetid”-ccine Delight
Several days ahead, prepare little plates of pasta with fresh sausage and cream sauce. Leave out at room temperature until pungent and curdled. With any luck, your snacks will attract a swarm of houseflies! After marveling at the filthy black bugs’ buzzing and alighting, provide swatters so the kids can kill ’em (our test group of children LOVED this part!) Then dig in!
SUBSTITUTE: Root around in your trash for week-old perishable food (hamburger meat works well)
THURSDAY: Hello Hailstones
For this yummy snack, simply collect stones from the yard. Safety note: make sure they are small enough to be swallowed without excessive choking. Hide the stones in bowls of black raspberry or grape Jell-O (the darker the better, to simulate a blackened sky). Tip: don’t tell the kids about the “hail.” Let ’em be surprised by every chunky spoonful!
SUBSTITUTE: Leftover Cheerios mixed with goldfish crackers
FRIDAY: Dead Babies
This is a wonderful “make-it-yourself” snack that looks as good as it tastes! Give each child large “jet-puffed” marshmallows to make the head and body of their “baby.” Add-ons can include raisins for shriveled eyeballs, pieces of red Twizzlers for “vomit” and dark chocolate “shrouds.” Make sure you and your campers sing a rousing chorus of “Too Bad, Too Sad! (The Dead Baby Song)” before devouring today’s snack!
SUBSTITUTE: Leftover Cheerios, goldfish crackers, ketchup, rancid meat and marshmallows
Wondering about the other activity centers in “Fun With the Plagues!”? We would be too! But trust us, we have thought of EVERYTHING in our quest for the ultimate VBS experience. Here are some highlights:
GAMES:
Super Sports with Pharaoh includes the exciting “Pyramid Building Relay Race,” where the little ones compete to assemble full-scale Giza replicas. There’ll be hijinks aplenty as the tots run around in your hot, unshaded church yard carrying five pound clay bricks. For extra authenticity, no water bottles allowed!
CRAFTS:
Our Craft Corner projects were really fun to create. Your tykes will enjoy finger painting signs saying “Help Me!!” with blood-red paint, not to mention making “Bubble Wrap Boils” art to take home.
MUSIC:
We’re very proud of our all-original songs for Music Time. We just know the parents will love hearing the kiddos singing “Froggies from Heaven” and “We All Have Lice and We’re Itching for the Lord!” over and over and over for the rest of the summer! Make sure you order enough Music CDs for every family!
Housekeeping Hints: Make sure you have medical release forms on file for each child, absolving your church of all responsibility for illness, and do keep some Ipecac handy, just in case.
Enjoy “Fun with the Plagues!” VBS this summer! It’s sure to be a week your kiddos (and their pediatricians) will never forget!