HUMOR
Snake Oil, Inc. Demands FDA Approval for Our Homeopathic Alzheimer’s Cure
We seek accelerated approval for use in treating that most dreaded Alzheimer’s symptom, an overabundance of cash.
Dear FDA Regulators,
In light of your decision to grant accelerated approval to Biogen’s new Alzheimer’s drug, Aduhelm, Snake Oil, Inc. hereby requests that you reconsider your refusal to approve our patented homeopathic Alzheimer’s cure, Lostkeys. You rejected our original application because Lostkeys, “doesn’t work.” Well, it seems like you’ve got a double standard there, because neither does Aduhelm!
We are happy to provide letters of support from patients and families desperate for a glimmer of hope if that would accelerate approval. We also have rave reviews on Facebook from people who swear that our tincture, which contains water’s memory of lost items (see Frozen 2), helped them find their keys. We at Snake Oil, Inc. know in our hearts that losing your keys is the true cause of Alzheimer’s disease.
Unlike Biogen’s on-again-off-again clinical trials for Aduhelm, our clinical trial was conclusive and highly convincing. We proved that Lostkeys is 100% effective at transferring money from patients and their families to…
