Distracted Children
There are children highly distracted that needs constant reminder. What is effective way to raise this kind of children? We will talk about some approaches to help this type of children. This story is based on article originally issued in Korean newspaper, Hani by Jinkyun Park.
Do you have distracted children?
- Is your child easily distracted?
- Does he/she lose interest quickly?
- In order to finish a task, parents have to step in constantly.
- When task is challenging, the children do not want to continue.
If you say yes to a few of the questions above, then you may have distracted child.
This type of children may show less control on emotion or have lower grade. They may lose stuff at school more often. However, this type of children also have pros such as they tend to be more creative as their never ending curiosity can give quirky outcome and their interests are vast.
1. Don’t be negative
As parents, we may fall into judgemental assessment of ‘why aren’t you paying attention?’ because it is more frustrating! Though this may remind them that things are not in order to them, you probably know that saying this to them often does not change their behavior. When kids listen to this more frequently, they may ignore or think that parents may not like them.
It is better to try to understand them then give more constructive feedback.
2. Give prompt and constructive response
This type of children actually needs more and frequent response for their action as their interest changes quickly. Parents need to watch and catch any chance when they are doing well or losing interest or being reckless then give feedback promptly. The short feedback loop of this children is more effective.
3. Suggest ahead
If you are not expecting that they will use good their judgement to act properly in, then you may even pre-empt saying like
Hey, it is parking lot here, if you behave, then we can reach to store soon where we can buy snack that you like.
If you respond only when things happen, then it can become negative easily. Parents need to think ahead so that it can lead to something that they want.
4. Divide and conquer
For homework situation, it is too much to ask to finish a homework in short time. Then splitting them to more reasonable size is better. Before they start homework, you can plan with child to break down. This can teach them on how to divide the work and they can eventually own this part.
Also, the children may respond better with visual guide such as whiteboard rather than verbal discussion.
5. Let them be active
The children with high energy and interest need to exert this in more physical setting. It is good to go out and let kids play in active activities. How about soccer, martial art etc. for boys or dance for girls? You can find them at http://greensprout.co
6. Be consistent
Setting the boundary is important and this has to be consistent throughout. You may set a few rules but if rules change often and new rules are added in random fashion, it soon becomes non-effective. You can set a new rule and wait until that is effective or adjust it accordingly if it is not working.
Wrapping Up
There are challenges that parents face that needs quick thinking. The distracted children would need more of that than others. It is not necessarily bad. It may mean they have more potential in unexpected way. But it certainly requires more attention from parents. I hope with the approaches introduced above can help raise the children better.
