How does it feel to hit the glass ceiling?
For those who have followed my journey, you know I had to take a break from my job because I had been diagnosed with burnout.
Truth be said, leaving felt like the only way out after navigating through some hard-to-digest situations for a while.
But let’s start from the beginning, shall we?
I started doing Tech when I didn’t even know it was Tech. I just saw an opportunity of starting a business online, and I figured out the way to make it happen. It was around 2015 when I was trying to solve business and customer issues in my mind. I was only 25.
Moving into Product Management had not been easy for me. I already had been a startup founder with a Tech co-founder and built a digital product that wasn’t massively adopted, to be honest. However, the startup scene in London — where I lived back in 2017 — nurtured me as a founder and gave me some skills to bootstrap my business which was already profitable offline.
After the failure of raising money, my co-founder left to build his own project, and I understood that after five years of juggling my master’s, taking care of a sick family member, and other jobs, it was time to move on.
I moved to Barcelona, and I was lucky enough to find someone who guided me into this job that was starting to be in high demand. I managed to be hired by an early-stage startup, and off I went onto the #womenintech journey that was super sexy. I wanted to prove to the world that I could do it, and I started to learn, and devour absolutely every single Medium article about it, books like “Measure what it matters”, “Design Sprint”, or the Lean series were my day-to-day.
I started to become a learning machine through Audible, Podcasts, and everything in between. I wanted to ace the interviews I was aiming at. I wanted to kill it. I dreamed to become one of the future employees of Google, Spotify, Workplace from Facebook, etc. and off I went to prove to them that I could be that.
My idea of success was to be among the best. It was such a skewed idea of success, but it did give me strength.
And, I worked hard for it. V-E-R-Y H-A-R-D. But like GIRLS HARD. HARD when we have to prove ourselves, and we need to do it two times better, or three times as much.
I was so immersed in it. I wanted to prove to the world that I could do it, and to myself that I could do it, and it became my only objective.
An objective that was going to mentally drain me so much down the line. Because I was always giving my 200%, and that can only last as much.
- I started a podcast where I interviewed people about tech so I could expand my knowledge.
- I started to network with people in person, and online.
- I organized events like Start-Up Weekend by Techstars in Barcelona.
- I became a speaker at events to learn from fellow colleagues.
- I started to teach Product Management at CodeOp.
- I organized live events where I brought women in Tech on stage to give visibility about biases.
- I started writing about it and shared my knowledge online, and on Medium.
All of this while I was trying to be at my best in my workplace, manage dependencies, be a proficient stakeholder manager, and try to meet up expectations that seemed to ask me to be proficient at all levels.
The bar was getting higher, and higher as I was being told, and honestly tied with my own bar, it became an impossible race to win.
Feedback was: “You are good, but…”
It felt so daunting as I felt that I was doing so much already. Everything seemed wrong.
In perspective, I think it was right at that moment when I felt that I hit the #theglassceiling and there is no more frustrating moment than realizing that what you’ve done so far hasn’t been recognized. I couldn’t cope with it in the workplace, and I didn’t know where to ask for support. I felt unvalued and worthless. Now, I know that those were the story I was telling myself, and it is on my to change the story — which I am currently doing —
However, I am grateful for that pushback because:
- It brought me where I am today — here in front of you —
- It brought me to question my values
- It brought me to understand what was important to me
And for me, the purpose is relevant. To feel that I am contributing to making the world a greater a better place.
Social justice is another relevant subject for me.
As a victim of discrimination due to my nationality, social justice, and equality is at the foundation of who I am. I wouldn’t be here writing this if I hadn’t had access to education.
I believe in education as the tool to dissipate racism and any type of discrimination. I believe in the power of opening minds, and inspiring values from an early age.
For this reason, I am back to teaching for a while.
It feels great to be in a place where you feel you are contributing to something greater than yourself. I am contributing to shaping minds. I am contributing to building a better future for people who will be part of our society.
I’ve changed my idea of success.
An idea that I wanted to be someone because I am already someone.
I am someone who is trying to be the best version of myself all the time.
I ditched the idea that I was someone only if I made it to whatever was considered the next level. To get that promotion. To hit the jackpot with a high salary.
I ditched the idea, but I also ditched tech.
Interestingly enough, I recently stumbled upon the term “#TheBrokenrung — or the first step up to manager — still holds women back. According to our #WomenInTheWorkplace2022 report, for every 100 men promoted from entry-level to manager, only 87 women are promoted, and only 82 women of color are promoted. ”
I don’t know if I should blame #TheBrokenrung as I think there is no one to blame for, rather than the ingrained biased society we lived in, and the societal conditioning that affects both, men, and women.
Men have it probably easier as their ladder has no broken rungs whereas we, women, timidly, and scaredly try to peek above the glass ceiling without hurting ourselves too hard.
As I am trying to recover from my fall, I will probably come stronger, and wiser, while trying to understand that despite trying my best — which I shall leave below my hyperactivity in the #womenintech scene as a beautiful souvenir — there is not so much left in my power than to advocate for #equalopportunities #inclusion and more kindness towards less privileged communities.
From the back of the stage, I want to tell women out there to keep at it, and to wait for me because I will be back sooner than later. And to men, to give women a helping hand.
#successdefinition #personalgrowth #values #equalopportunities #womenintech #glassceiling
