For the right of saying “I don’t know”

Biology Exam. I was 13 years-old. I didn’t the answer to a certain question, then I wrote “I don’t know the answer to this question”.

I got 0 points out of that question. I was a bit upset, once I felt my sincerity should somewhat count. I could have tried to beat around the bushes, but I chose to be honest. And that was worth nothing.

Sales meeting. Someone asked me what was the revenue coming from a given client. I replied: “Look, sincerely, I don’t know.”

I heard the talk. I supposedly had to know every single figure of my department.

Meeting with investors. Someone asked me how and when I was going to monetize my business. All I had was: “I don’t know that yet.”

They said I wasn’t ready. That I should have had all the projected results. Talks with a fellow entrepreneur. He asked me how many hits I would have in my web portal. I couldn’t help but saying “I have no idea. I hope it’ll be a lot.”

He thought I was out of my mind and said I hadn’t studied the market hard enough.

Dinner with friends. They started talking about the financial crisis in Cyprus. I had no idea what crisis was that they so passionately talking about. I even felt kind of ashamed for not knowing exactly where to pin point Cyprus on a map.

They said I was oblivious.

Really, folks?

Is it true that I must have the answers to everything? Is it true I can’t possibly say “I don’t know?”

We have created a society that punishes those who say that.

That doesn’t happen only to me. It happens every day, in any city, in any given profession, at any age, to everyone.

It gets worse: we have created people that come up with fake answers so they won’t display their not-knowing.

I don’t think there’s any harm intended. I see it as self- defense mechanism, an automatic way to reply to a question. The standard procedure is to make up a fake answer and say it convincingly, like you were absolutely sure

of what you are talking about.

I used to be like that. Today, I see how that made me feel bad about myself. Every single time I came up with a fake answer, I felt funny, as if my heart was giving me the talk.

I’m not ashamed to admit that I don’t know. I don’t have all the answers. And it’s ok not knowing them all.

Life is a field of infinite possibilities. How is it possible to know everything tending to the infinite?

We look up to people that say they know it all, that are somehow visionaries, with a long sight and the clear perception of how things are going to go in 10 years.

I don’t even know what’s going to happen tomorrow morning!

Have you ever seen a politician saying “I don’t know”?

To think that we must know all the answers makes us fill up our minds with tons of information. That pile of information drives us apart from our hearts.

We know too much; we don’t feel as much.

I’d rather know less. I’d rather miss part of the information and, with that, free up open space to listen to my ideas, my dreams and my intuition.

Is it true that I must have and answer to anything?

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Original article posted in Portuguese, translated by my friend Gabriel Galo