Computer: Please be my Valentine
Valentine’s Day is a day for expressing love. I’m expressing my love to something I love more than any man or woman.
My computer.
Dearest, you are constantly by my side — even when you’re forced to be. I still think it’s romantic. You have a battery life of 10 hours, and 16GB of ram — that’s pretty hot.
You haven’t abandoned me. I know it’s because you’re a computer but that’s longer than any of my exes, and you’re there for me from dusk to dawn. You have excellent memory, and more than what a girl could ask for. You’ve traveled with me across country to Silicon Valley, and out of the country. You also don’t complain, because you can’t. You haven’t even asked me for an AI for that — that’s an added bonus you have over other people.
The day we first met it was love at first sight — It was a life changing moment. You’ve empowered me to do what I love, and have a voice. I’ll be there for you, from your first boot, to your last shutdown. Even though I’m not one for celebrating Valentines day, you make me want to celebrate. Unlike most high school and college relationships, our love story won’t end with social media shade. Happy Valentines Day Mac.
*P.S. I don’t want to date my computer nor will I ever date my computer.