Reflection, Goals and Growth
By Katya Ostor, Upper School Counselor, Hackley School
May is Mental Health Awareness Month, and it is also a good time to practice self care and reassess our priorities and goals. I personally like to approach this month by spreading positivity and encouragement to friends and family and anyone with whom I cross paths while normalizing conversations about our unique emotional experiences. Mental health awareness looks different from one person to the next, and I encourage you to consider how it shows up for you, especially during one of the busiest times of the school year.
As we face the end of the academic year and look forward with excitement toward the summer, it may be difficult to focus on goals for 2024–2025. With that in mind, now is the best time to reflect on what you’ve accomplished and learned personally and emotionally. During this time, you might check in with yourself and ask, “What is my emotional temperature right now? What’s my predominant mood? What lessons might I want to take with me into next year? How might I want things to change or stay the same?” Asking yourself these questions offers a clear framework for how to organize your thoughts and goals.
It’s helpful to see our inner experience as our mental fitness. Mental fitness can be defined as having and cultivating a state of well-being and awareness of how we think, behave and feel (click here to read more about mental fitness). It is not one-size-fits-all, and it’s a constant process of self-reflection and understanding. Just as with our physical health, it’s important to care for and strengthen our emotional health. Prioritizing mental fitness is another aspect of healthy living. This includes paying attention to our moods, stressors and work-life balance. Find what makes you feel relaxed and seek experiences to connect with friends and community.
The end of a school year is a time of transition and change. It is a perfect time to think how we move purposefully through our experiences (or life), take what we have learned, add what we are hopeful for and create real goals, not just for tangible things but the intangible, such as the kind of person you want to be, the kind of friend you could be, and even how you take care of yourself. Setting a frame of mind of how to enter the new year and to move forward with that energy through the summer helps to create a stronger commitment to the goals you’ve set.
Approaching this exercise requires only a few steps:
- First, find a quiet place to sit and think back to experiences over the past year. Try to remember both positive and negative moments.
- Then, write down a few examples that stood out as being the most significant. Were there any themes or patterns of behaviors or experiences that you would like to change or replicate?
- Finally, think of the next year in respect to all areas: socially, academically and personally. Try to create goals or intentions for each area. Think about how those goals could be started and supported throughout the summer.
At the end of the summer, take some time to revisit this exercise. Review the goals and intentions you created and check in with yourself. Are the goals you outlined still valid and important to you? If yes, go forward into a new school year with those at the forefront of your mind. If not, what has changed and what is important to you now? It might be helpful to start over: sit quietly and reflect on your personal intentions and on the experiences that inform them.
The beauty of this practice is that it is constantly evolving and growing, much like us!
About the author: Katya Ostor is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker with more than 20 years of clinical experience through work in hospitals, clinics and schools. She earned a master’s degree in social work from Boston College and a bachelor’s degree in public health from Brown University. She enjoys educating the community about mental health while fostering acceptance and understanding of the challenges faced by all age groups. She joined Hackley in January 2021 as the Upper School counselor.
