“power tools on case” by Fancycrave on Unsplash

The Things We Own

Jake
Jake
Sep 21, 2018 · 3 min read

I have never had a true toolbox
Which may make me less of a man in the eyes of certain people
But I have come to know though we think they do
The things we own or in this case lack do not define us
See I grew up in an oilfield home
My father has spent every year of his adult life on rig platforms
and being an oilfield worker means having many toolboxes
Dented and beat up from years of use and abuse
Full of mismatched wrenches and sockets
Kinda like that sock drawer full of lone singles
you can’t seem to get rid of
Holding out hope the others may show up someday
And his father before him, a Vietnam vet
He had his own toolbox, too
Just like the many men that came before him I’m sure

Now the closest thing I have to a toolbox
is the one I took half ownership of when I married my wife
It’s one of the many things she brought into the marriage
And to be honest it’s less of a toolbox and more of a tool purse
A black and pink bag that carries the handful of handyman and women things we have accumulated over the past few years

All I know is though we think they do
the things we own or lack do not define us
And for that I’m glad,
but I’m willing to bet you’re still just as scared as I am
that in the search and pursuit of more
I will allow the deepest part of who I am to become my pockets

A little over year ago my wife and I moved into an RV
In the process we got rid of much of what we owned
So much so, that now, I if I wanted
I could fit my life in my 2014 Jeep patriot
And the fact that I say it like that
I can fit my life in my 2014 Jeep patriot
tells you I still have a lot of work to do

See all I know is though we think they do
The things we own or lack do not define us

Because I promise you that car on your dream board,
the one you envision yourself driving down the seawall
no matter how shiny
no matter how fast
no matter how sleek
it won’t fill any holes in your heart
The truth is once you get it
anyone else who has one won’t notice
and the rest of us
We are just gonna look at you, like you are
that much more of an asshole when you cut us off in traffic

Speaking of cars, just this past week
coming down I-45 back to the island
a Tesla sped by, it’s the only one I have ever seen covered in mud
dried splatters down the side forcing the paint to scream in protest
and even though I know the things we own don’t define us
it made me giddy as I cruised by
because mine,
like a lone diamond leftover from a former life,
delicately set around the neck of a poor widow refusing to let go
Mine, my Jeep Patriot, at a quarter the cost
sparkled


This poem was originally shared as a spoken word piece.

half truths

Meditations and observations at the crossroads of faith, life lessons, love, creativity and encouragement for when life gets rough. A journal from Jake Lira.

Jake

Written by

Jake

I want to write the words I wish were written for me. For those dark moments I kept to myself and insisted on standing alone — even though I never really was.

half truths

Meditations and observations at the crossroads of faith, life lessons, love, creativity and encouragement for when life gets rough. A journal from Jake Lira.

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