Local Couple Conducts Relationship Performance Review
NOE VALLEY, SAN FRANCISCO — While most people welcomed the new year with toasts of champagne, local couple Lance Lundberg and Gerald Tran were hard at work preparing for the latest round of their relationship performance reviews.
After composing written evaluations individually, Mr. Lundberg and Mr. Tran met together to share feedback with their partner. “I feel that we have been very effective in tackling problems together. One example was how we planned that trip to Thailand last year,” said Mr. Tran. “However, sometimes you talk over me without realizing it. You could improve by listening more.”
Mr. Lundberg and Mr. Tran, who have been dating for a year and a half, were inspired to begin conducting relationship performance reviews by the processes they use at work for roadmap planning. “We firmly believe that this process of sharing feedback is critical to maintaining a high performance relationship,” said Mr. Lundberg. “If you plan out your work in such detail, why wouldn’t you want to plan out the rest of your life with that same discipline?”
In addition to their quarterly relationship performance reviews, the couple has biweekly one-on-one meetings to review the progress of their relationship. In their last one-on-one, the couple discussed the most likely reasons their relationship may fail and brainstormed solutions for how to avoid or accelerate potential pitfalls: like any good startup, reasoned Mr. Lundberg, it was important for their relationship to “fail fast.”
Mr. Lundberg pointed out that Mr. Tran’s long working hours meant that they rarely see each other in the middle of the week. At the end of their one-on-one, they aligned on action items to have weekly “date nights” and to begin tracking a quantifiable metric of how many hours they spend together each week.
The couple is looking to integrate more process as their relationship becomes more mature. In addition to drafting their individual and joint Q1 OKRs, they deliberated how to assemble a board of directors for their relationship. Mr. Lundberg suggested each partner should appoint an equal number of board members, drawn from their close friends and family, whereas Mr. Tran argued that board seats should be allocated based on partner performance on OKRs.
At press time, after reviewing their accumulated relationship feedback, Mr. Lundberg and Mr. Tran mutually agreed that their relationship was firmly “meeting expectations.” As compensation, Mr. Lundberg would be able redeem five massages at any time, whereas Mr. Tran opted for three homemade dinners, dishwashing included.
