Startup Engineer Retires To Google

Google is well known as a popular techie retirement destination, as well as being a multibillion dollar search company.

TABLY.LY HQ, SAN FRANCISCO — Yuwen Liu, an engineer at enterprise startup Tably.ly, announced in a company-wide email this morning that she would be leaving to retire to Google.

Ms. Liu, who was the third engineer at Tably.ly, built most of the company’s backend stack by working 100 hour weeks for years. “After exactly four years and one day of hard work here at Tably.ly, I will be retiring to Google to spend more time with my family, which will be much easier when I work 10–5 every day,” she wrote. “Including time on the shuttle, meals, and snacktimes.”

Google, like many other mega-large tech companies, has long been a reliable and desirable retirement destination for even moderately competent engineers. However, Google stands out for its luxurious perks, including its free high-end Indian restaurant, concierge services, hipster cafes with tattooed baristas (imported from nearby San Francisco) serving artisan coffee, and complimentary yoga classes, all carefully cultivated by Google’s internal “perks team.”

The Google Bowling Alley

Ms. Liu announced that she will be joining “the Googs” as a staff software engineer, where she will be supervised by a single overstretched manager that she will talk to in passing approximately once a month, allowing her to have more time to work on her own projects without any meddling managerial oversight.

Ms. Liu, 32, had worked at multiple startups before Tably.ly. She wrote, “It was a hard decision to leave our cramped offices and empty drinks fridge for the free smoothies, Googlebikes, and indoor putting greens at the Googleplex, but I’m confident that this is the right next step for me.”

“I am proud of all that we’ve accomplished here at Tably.ly. I look forward to my stable six figure salary, liquid equity, and ridiculous perks as I rest and vest at the Googs for the next few years. Feel free to come by for lunch some time!”


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