How to handle being single at Christmas
Christmas is a time of year when my single status is acutely highlighted. This is much to my chagrin.
Time spent with extended family suddenly becomes the perfect breeding ground for intense interrogation regarding my status. It seems hard for my family and society as a whole to comprehend that I am a happy single thirty-something year old. Popular opinion dictates that I should be desperately searching for a significant other.
During the festive season sleeping arrangements have also highlighted where on the rung of society my status leaves me. I will spare you the suspense — it is at the bottom. Singletons like me are relegated to couches or the kid’s room.
Yet this is not a big gripe of mine. I can see why married couples get preference and especially why couples with young children get specific room privileges. I am happy to sleep anywhere and am grateful that my relatives open their home to me.
It is also that time of year that sees a Mariah Carey revival with that song. It is clearly not a song for single folk. Her voice is a warning sound for couples to assume the position poised for slow dancing. Singletons are left with two options —The first is to sheepishly retreat, while the other is to remain defiant and keep dancing before eventually leaving with their tail between their legs.
It can get a little tiresome to continually defend my choice to be single. While couples rarely get quizzed or judged about their decision to remain together or procreate. So here are a few tips to see you through the inevitable judgement during the festive season.
1. Revel in the positive attributions of being single
Often I witness people who are single, yet are not revelling in the positives it provides. They want a relationship desperately. Being single is awesome.
- You can spend your time doing anything you wish.
- You can make selfish choices
- Your decisions do not have to take into account another persons feelings and dreams
- You can explore, travel and learn
- You can figure out who you are
- You can figure out what you love to do
Shall I go on? When I am quizzed about being single I do not preach or get angry but merely give a summary statement that right now I am happy to be single. It swiftly deflates the line of questioning.
2. Singletons beware of the alcoholic temptress
Sometimes the festive season can induce a desperate need to find someone, anyone amongst the throng of cheerful Christmas jumpers.
I feel who you choose to entangle yourself with should not be dictated by alcohol.
Alcohol can make you do things that are not very clever.
These festivities seem less light-hearted at the time. But in the cold light of day, such decisions can change the course of your life.
3. You can be your own special someone
Often, the fact that you have no one too special to share Christmas with can highlight a hole in your life.
More importantly, there is a lack of a thoughtful gift.
However, who knows you better than you know yourself? I like to splurge on myself.
It is really important to make sure that I always take care of myself and do not look to someone else to make sure I am ok. I think that is the most important thought to have when one year ends and I am on the cusp of a new year.
Happy new year kind humans, I hope 2018 has been kind to you. If not I hope 2019 will bring better things into your life!
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